# The Naruto shippuuden Spoof(a comedy)



## SasukeKunsGirl56 (Apr 1, 2007)

hey guys!wow i havent been on this site for like 4 months!well this is my first story in a loooonnnngggg time!so it might not be good so if its bad dont be mean!i have this on fanfiction.net too!this is the shipuudenn series of Naruto so u might not get it if u dont know..DEDICATED TO MY BEST FRIEND AMY!
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Chapter one!
?.this fic may look long, but it is deliberately written in a childish and easy to read way?totally deliberate?yup?(eye shift)

In the land of sand, an important meeting was going on.

Yuura: ?So we have agreed?we will get a large pepperoni, three large sausages, and a blood covered cheese for Gaara.?

Gaara: ??.?

Random elder: ?Gaara is a very poor kazekage and is a threat to our village!?

Gaara: ???

Other random elder: ?He?s right in front of you.?

Random elder: ?Who is??

Yuura: ?What does this have to do with pizza??

Random elder had a heart attack and died.

Baki: ?We need more?young people in this council.?

Yuura: ?Whatever. I?m going to order pizza.?

Suddenly, there is a huge close up on Yuura, who suddenly becomes dark and ominous.

Yuura: ?I see?I remember now?they all want my pizza!...oh and I am actually a spy? but more importantly THEY WANT MY PIZZA!?

Meanwhile, outside Suna

Diedara: ?Come on Sasori, lets show these people our beautiful art.?

Sasori: ?YES! We can make the world a happier place!?

Diedara: ?I think I will make a birdy out of sheer happiness and fly over the village to inspire people!?

As Diedara and Sasori approached the wall, the sand jonin started throwing rocks on them.

Diedara: ?OH NO! WHAT SHALL WE DO!?

Sasori: ?Fight scene-skip no jutsu!?

Suddenly all of the sand jonin except Yuura are dead?I mean uh...sleeping?yah sleeping.

Yuura: ?I guess since I?m not dead?I must be your ally! Want to share my pizza??

Sasori: ?Sure.?

Diedara: ?Fine you stay here! I will show the village of sand what a blast art is, yeah?

Diedara skipped merrily into sand.

At the same time, Gaara?s kazekage senses were tingling.

Gaara: ?My kazekage senses are tingling??

Right then a giant spider walks into his room.

Gaara: ?But what could it be??

Then the spider exploded, killing the five jonin around it.

Gaara: ?OH MY GOD! The pizza isn?t here yet! There must be something wrong!?

Diedara continued to skip into town ignoring the exploding spiders killing people around him.

Then Gaara appeared in front of him looking really cool for no particular reason.

Diedara: ?Have you come to greet me??

Gaara: ?There are no birds like that in the desert.?

Diedara: ?What??

Gaara: ?That giant bird circling the village??

Diedara: ?That isn?t my bird?yah?

Then the giant bird swooped down, ate a small group of chunin, and flew away.

Gaara: ?That is the last straw! It is time for a kick ass battle!?

Diedara made her own bird out of pure happiness and flew away on it as Gaara followed on his sand.

Diedara: ?I just want to show you my art!?

Gaara flew up to Diedara and crushed her arm with the sand.

Random person: ?LOOK! OUR KAZEKAGE IS MURDERING A RANDOM TOURIST! WE LOVE YOU KAZEKAGE!?

Fangirl: ?WE LOVE YOU GAARA! EVEN THOUGH WE NEVER ACKNOWLEDGED YOU AS A KID!?

Fanboy: ?Quit using caps.?

Fangirl: ???

Fanboy: ???

Fangirls kill the fanboy.

Gaara: ?My?groupie senses are tingling?THEY KILLED MY FANBOY! THE BASTARDS!?

Diedara: ?I am just trying to show you my art! Look.?

While Gaara was distracted, Diedara threw a pigeon at Gaara, which exploded.

Diedara: ?What? That wasn?t one of my exploding pigeons. That was a normal one?yah?

Gaara started to fall in slow motion.

Meanwhile in Konoha.

Temari was drinking her tea, when, her tea cup randomly shatters.

Temari: ?I don?t believe in this kind of stuff, but maybe?something bad is happening??

Just then, a giant symbol of the word ?love? fell from above her and shattered into little tiny pieces.

Temari: Hmm? it feels like something is wrong.

Just then, a person who looked strangely like Gaara, a person who was wearing a black coat with roses on it, and a kid who looks like Michel Jackson walked up to each other in front of Temari.

After Mini MJ got beaten in such a way his body looked like the word ?love? he blew up. Then the rose kid threw an exploding birdy at the kid who looked strangely like Gaara, and fed him to a random giant bird in the sky.

Temari: ?OH MY GOD! I left the stove on back at sand?.I NEED TO GO BACK!?

Back to slow motion falling Gaara? Gaara begins to contemplate the secret of life and what true art is?surely life is merely the essence of an individual coexisting in such a way that he, she, or it effects the universe in a small abstract way, so to die without any impact on life whatsoever was to-

The essence of the readers got bored of the philosophy and made Gaara explode.

Kankuro: ?NO! GAARA!?

Diedra: ?Oh my god! I accidentally hurt him! I need to bring him back with me so we can save him!?

Diedra flew Gaara away on his giant bird.

Kankuro: ?I will not let Gaara die!?

FLASHBACKIFY!

Gaara: ?I do not want people to view me as a weapon anymore?but as a real human being. Which is why I have decided to become kazekage.?

Kankuro: ?So? in order to not be viewed as a weapon?you are going to become the villages main military tool? and what is used as a weapon to defend sands honor??

Gaara: ?????

Kankuro: ?Are you okay??

Gaara?s head explodes.

Kankuro: ?OH MY GOD!?

UNFLASHBACKIFY

Kankuro: ?I failed you once?I will not make your head explode again!?

Kankuro caught up to the giant bird, Diedara, and Sasori?.but for some reason not Yuura.

Kankuro: ?Give Gaara back to me!?

Sasori: ?Oh no. this person doesn?t know that we are trying to help his brother. You go on Diedara as I explain the situation to him?yah?

Kankuro: ?Wait! Come back!?

Sasori: ?No you don?t understand. We,?

Kankuro threw out three scrolls.

Insert a million close ups here.

Kankuro looked kick ass for a second using three puppets.

Sasori: ?There is only one way to save myself. I must use my ultimate jutsu! FIGHT SCENE-SKIP NO JUTSU!?

Kankuro?s puppets spontaneously fall apart and he falls on the ground bleeding profusely.

Sasori: ?Wow. I guess that must have been a really kick ass fight?.I had to use my tail??

Kankuro: ?Damn?he uses poison too.?

Sasori: ?Why would I kill those puppets? I made them. There must be something wrong with my jutsu.?

Kankuro: ?Wait? your Sasori of the red sand!?

Sasori: ?Sasori of the?red?sand?? Where did you come up with that??

Kankuro: ?Isn?t that your name??

Sasori: ?No. My name is Sasori silly.?

Kankuro: ?Isn?t that your title??

Sasori: ?No my title is Sasori of the rainbow happy sand of fun.?

Kankuro: ?Then it is even worse than I feared??


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## SasukeKunsGirl56 (Apr 1, 2007)

CHAPTER TWO!
Sasori: “I would help you up…but I have to help your little brother.”

Sasori walked away in search for Diedara…and despite the fact that Diedara left about 15 minutes earlier, Sasori managed to catch up with him.

Diedara: “Did you explain the situation to him?”

Sasori: “I think so…actually I don’t know. But it doesn’t matter as long as we help this guy.”

Then Sasori takes off his hat to reveal that he is…weird looking…

Fangirls: “ZOMG! SO UGLY! GET AWAY FROM US!”

Meanwhile…

Naruto, Sakura, and Kakashi caught up with Temari.

Naruto: “Temari! We just received word that Gaara has been kidnapped just a few minutes ago.”

Temari: “Wait, you mean you got word about an event from a few minutes ago…that happened in a town that’s a three days walk from here…”

Naruto: “yah.”

Temari: “Okay. Lets go help my brother.”

And once again in sand……..

Old man whose name I do not bother to remember: “Are you alive dear?”

Old lady whose name I do bother to remember: “HA HA HA I was just pretending to play dead!”

Old man: “Ha ha. You have a great sense of humor, Chiyo”

Old lady whose name I bothered to remember who is apparently named Chiyo: “Ha ha ha.”

Baki entered the room.

The old man, being a fan of a popular anime called Naruto, remembered him from a particular scene.

Old man: “YOU KILLED HAYATE! DIE!”

The old man proceeds to strangle the man who is about three times his size.

Baki: “Um…yah ignoring the senile old man strangling me…we need your help Chiyo.”

Old man: “WHY NOT MY HELP! DIE!”

Chiyo: “No. The only thing I want to do is give my grandson this sweater I knitted for him.”

Baki: “That can be arranged. Your grandson just maimed a kick ass character. And we want him dead! I mean…warm and snuggly in a sweater…”

Old man: “Why does he need a sweater in the middle of the desert? DIE!”

Chiyo: “Okay. I guess I shall help…let me just drain Kankuro’s uberness so I can do something productive.”

Chiyo walks over to Kankuro and takes off his purple face paint.

Kankuro: “THE SOURCE OF MY POWER! NOOOOOOO!”

Baki: “Oh…we were also going to ask you to heal him…”

Chiyo: “I can’t do that! The essence of happiness has been put into the bloodstream!”

Baki: “You mean the poison?”

Chiyo: “Yes…the…poison…”

It was at this time that Sakura, Naruto, and Kakashi ran in…despite the fact that they were still 2 and a half days away last time we checked….wait…that didn’t happen in the manga! ZOMG LOOP HOLE

Sakura: “Stay back! I will help him!”

Chiyo: “ZOMG WHITE FANG!”

Chiyo punched Sakura.

Chiyo: “Oh wait wrong person…”

Chiyo punched Kakashi

Kakashi: “I’m not the white fang I’m the white fangs son!”

Chiyo: “Oh…DIE SON OF THE WHITE FANG!”

Kakashi placed Naruto in front of him as a human shield.

Sakura stuck her hand into Kankuro’s chest.

Kankuro: “OH MY GOD THAT HURTS!”

Sakura pulled out something that looked vaguely like a heart.

Sakura: “I have removed the poison!”

Chiyo: “That’s not the essence of happiness…that’s his pancreas!”

Baki: “No that’s his heart…”

Chiyo: “Liver!”

Baki: “…I think he’s dead…”

Sakura: “Um…I am going to uh…make a cure now…yah…”

Kankuro: “Don’t worry…I am too uber to die…”

Chiyo: “Oh hey there’s still some face paint on his nose.”

Chiyo wiped it up, and Kankuro went into spasms and died…again…


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## Eureka (Apr 1, 2007)

I actually find it easier to read when you dont write it like a play. Makes it more comfterable, you know. Some more details, and descriptions would be nice.

But I guess thats not the point of this fic... I Lol'd


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## DiedarasLonleyLuv (May 28, 2007)

DEIDARA IS A GUY U...u...PER...son...yeah....i do like the story though, even though it makes absolutely NO sense...


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## pancake (May 28, 2007)

Uh its spelled Deidara...

D:

-doesnt like the fact that you're trying to make dei a goodie goodie-

Oh wel, it's your fic.

But most of it its from Naruto shippuuden, you need to come up with something more itneresting.


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## PervyLlama (May 28, 2007)

You spelled Deidara wrong. D:

And he's a man. DDD:


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## Caitlyn Jenner (May 28, 2007)

aare you trying to be not funny?


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## Kisara_Momochi (Jun 2, 2007)

omg,  i couldn't stop laughing. this is so freaking funny


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## naruto_fan_gurl101 (Jun 2, 2007)

this is so funny


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## MSkyDragons (Jun 3, 2007)

The middle section was fairly amusing, and had some funny lines in it. Though, as others have mentioned, it was distracting that Deidara was spelled wrong and was refered to as "her" when he is, in fact, a man.


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