# What kind of movie fan are you?



## Stunna (Jun 17, 2011)

*Spoiler*: _Explaining the poster_ 




Since films are the tentpole that holds up our entire modern culture (supplying us with most of our heroes, moral lessons and opportunities to watch robots punching other robots) we inevitably find ourselves in conversation with other movie fans. Many of these fans are impossible to talk to, because they fall into the following categories:

The Foreign Film Purist

Thinks that American artistic sensibilities are inherently flawed. Like their maid Maria, won't watch anything without subtitles. Unlike Maria, has a choice.

The Prophet

They think it's their job to outsmart the screenwriter at every turn. As you sit there, deeply engaged in the movie, it is The Prophet's job to look bored, grumbling about how predictable this shit is. Whenever there is a dramatic beat or turns of events, The Prophet is known to roll his eyes and say "called it."

The Film Student

Owns a video camera, wants to go to film school or is already there, and holy shit do they love to talk about it. Will join any conversation about any movie and casually throw in technical terms to show off his knowledge of the medium. While you're talking about how awesome the character or story was, they're talking about how much the sound mixing sucked.

The Old-Timer

This isn't necessarily an old guy. Like the kid who discovered classic rock in middle school, followed swiftly by classical music, this is anyone who insists that modern movies ain't got nothing on cinema's Golden Age.

The Tech Geek

Is obsessed with watching every movie in a level of clarity not even the filmmakers have seen it in. Somehow manages to turn every conversation into a discussion of his home theater set-up. For ever minute spent watching film, they have spent two hours messing with cables.

The Deconstructionist

LIke a crazy person who loves his bunny so much he decides to take it apart to see how it works. This person can't simply enjoy movies for what they are, but must examine the motive behind every single choice the filmmakers made. Employs useless Philosophy degree on movie nights by lecturing fellow viewers about layers of subtext and symbolism that almost certainly aren't there.

The English Student

Is a little too proud of those English Lit classes he took at community college. Lives to tell everyone why "the book was better."

Indie-ana Douche

Lives by a strict critical code. If a movie costs more than a million dollars to make, it's a piece of worthless commercial trash. Insists that real drama must involve a transgender/alcoholic/boring protagonist played by Philip Seymour Hoffman/William H. Macy/Parker Posey whose inability to achieve success as a writer/parent/human being leads to suicide/overdose/other method of dying alone.

The Trivia-Night Champion

Has read extensively on film; uses this acquired knowledge to show off during movie night. Points out the little facts that no one besides him cares about.



Stolen from Cracked.

I'm the Trivia-Night Champion.


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## ~Gesy~ (Jun 17, 2011)

none of the above

but i guess i'm closer to being an old timer.


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## Stunna (Jun 17, 2011)

Well no need to restrict yourself to the poster if you don't fit.


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## Ae (Jun 17, 2011)

I'm that guy that watch any movie as long as the trailer impresses him.


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## ~Gesy~ (Jun 17, 2011)

Stunna said:


> Well no need to restrict yourself to the poster if you don't fit.





lol but I do like watching old flicks. I get to experience an old world that isn't so familiar to me, and I do agree with the opinion that the movies back then were deeper back then. But that might be because they didn't just let the computer do all the work and had to be more creative when it came to the presentation.


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## Ennoea (Jun 17, 2011)

A mixture of all of them, minus the Film Student, I don't like Film Students.


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## Violent by Design (Jun 18, 2011)

im closest to a de-constructionist.


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## Furious George (Jun 18, 2011)

Mostly an Old Timer with a slight touch of Film Student.


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## Mist Puppet (Jun 18, 2011)

None of them. 

I just watch movies that are entertaining.


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## Mr. Kaneda (Jun 18, 2011)

I'm a mixture of The English Student, The Old Timer, The Trivia-Night Champion.


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## Ishamael (Jun 18, 2011)

I'm surprised they didn't have like an annoying 13 year old or something. Basically those kids that see a new movie and immediately proclaim it the greatest movie they've ever seen only to make the same claim the next time they something even newer. You could also probably throw in that they hate older movies.

As for myself I'm probably closest to de-constructionist and trivia champ.


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## Samavarti (Jun 18, 2011)

The Foreign Film Purist and The Old Timer, are the ones that are closer to the type of fan that i am.


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## Parallax (Jun 18, 2011)

kinda all of them really.

I prefer character driven and actor pieces over most films though.


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## Taleran (Jun 18, 2011)

I like movies, confining myself in genre or styles of film would limit the quality of what I get to experience.

All of the Above & None at all.


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## Kαrin (Jun 18, 2011)

The English Student describes me the best.


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## Felt (Jun 18, 2011)

Old-Timer and Trivia-Night Champion.


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## The Potential (Jun 18, 2011)

Mist Puppet said:


> None of them.
> 
> I just watch movies that are entertaining.



Pretty much this.

All of the above seem to nitpicky.


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## Stunna (Jun 18, 2011)

So those of you who refuse to choose one have absolutely zero biases or preferences or traits whatsoever?


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## emROARS (Jun 18, 2011)

triva night champion and english student.


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## typhoon72 (Jun 18, 2011)

Less extream versions of the Old Timer + Deconstructionist + English Student


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## Anarch (Jun 18, 2011)

kind of a cross between de constructionist and english student


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## Taleran (Jun 18, 2011)

Stunna said:


> So those of you who refuse to choose one have absolutely zero *biases or preferences or traits* whatsoever?




Sure I have one. I prefer quality to crap.


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## The Potential (Jun 18, 2011)

Not saying I enjoy every movie, I just don't have as many preferences as most of you do.

It doesn't take to much for me to enjoy a movie.


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## Magnum Miracles (Jun 18, 2011)

I'll admit it,I'm the Trivia Night Champion .

My family and I were watching 24 the other night,and I couldn't help but  pick out that Spok,Robocop,and Jigsaw,are all in 24,along with a couple of other big names.

I hate Tech Geeks though . I can't even talk to my friend about movies,because he's talking more about his TV than the movie itself,and I doubt he even half payed attention to the movie .

I'm also a little bit of a Deconstructionist,and Old-Timer.


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## Stunna (Jun 18, 2011)

Well, I'm open to any genre, but I prefer science fiction, fantasy, and adventure.


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## Jena (Jun 18, 2011)

Before I clicked into this thread, I thought "_Hmmm, this reminds me of that article I read on Cracked a while back..._" 

I'm definitely a mix of the English Student and a little of the Trivia-Night Champion. And a little bit of Bitch Who Won't Shut Up During the Movie.


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## Mist Puppet (Jun 18, 2011)

Stunna said:


> So those of you who refuse to choose one have absolutely zero biases or preferences or traits whatsoever?



None listed don't describe me at all. 

If I had to label myself, I'd be the guy who watches a movie, thinks its terrible, and then goes on an anime forum and tells everyone else about my experience. And flame people who disagree with me in a very passive aggressive way.


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## Magnum Miracles (Jun 18, 2011)

Jena said:


> Before I clicked into this thread, I thought "_Hmmm, this reminds me of that article I read on Cracked a while back..._"
> 
> I'm definitely a mix of the English Student and a little of the Trivia-Night Champion. And a little bit of *Bitch Who Won't Shut Up During the Movie.*


You bitch . That's just cruel when trying to watch something . I had to listen to my mother scream at our roofer while I was trying to watch True Grit. It was agitating.


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## edelweiss (Jun 19, 2011)

Mix between The Prophet and the Deconstructionist. Pretty sure I've been like that since I was a little kid, too. LOL.  I used to piss my parents off when I watched movies with them, because I would guess the ending/plot/next scene and be right fairly often. Parents don't like their 6 year old getting it before them I guess.


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## Parallax (Jun 19, 2011)

Taleran said:


> Sure I have one. I prefer quality to crap.



I can get behind this

but c'mon everyone has a genre they slightly enjoy more than any other.  Doesn't make you biased towards other genres.


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## Taleran (Jun 19, 2011)

Yeah but that is the thing. Those categories do not touch on genre at all. Its all about the general behind the scenes stuff

Also the English student quote is the most WRONG thing I have ever read. Fincher's take on Fight Club completely demolishes the book.


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## MajorThor (Jun 19, 2011)

The Tech Geek, all the way.


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## Ech?ux (Jun 19, 2011)

I'm the guy who understands what a movie is offering and finds a way to enjoy it in some way regardless as to whether or not it owns up to societies or everyone's personal expectations. 

That said, I, too, have my expectations and get let down. Doesn't mean that I don't enjoy the film, simply means I didn't enjoy it as much as I thought I could have.


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## Parallax (Jun 19, 2011)

Taleran said:


> Also the English student quote is the most WRONG thing I have ever read. Fincher's take on Fight Club completely demolishes the book.



And there are many things wrong with this sentence :|


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## Sen (Jun 19, 2011)

I suppose out of those options, The De-constructionist + The English Student since I enjoy looking for possible meanings in what I watch and how they reflect our society, plus I tend to prefer the books (Harry Potter ) compared to movie versions.  But I really don't watch many movies so I'm not a huge movie fan in general


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## Ech?ux (Jun 20, 2011)

Parallax said:


> And there are many things wrong with this sentence :|



Even the author agreed it was better than the book. I also agree it's better than the book. O_o


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## Parallax (Jun 20, 2011)

To say that it destroys it is quite a stretch though.  I do prefer the movie over the book but both are quite excellent.


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## CrazyMoronX (Jun 20, 2011)

I like watching shit and throwing my disbelief into the gutter and pissing on it.


What am I?


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## Comic Book Guy (Jun 20, 2011)

I'm the viewer who either enjoyed the film or didn't.

Everything else is secondary to that critical thing.


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## Magnum Miracles (Jun 20, 2011)

Ech?ux said:


> I'm the guy who understands what a movie is offering and finds a way to enjoy it in some way regardless as to whether or not it owns up to societies or everyone's personal expectations.
> 
> That said, I, too, have my expectations and get let down. Doesn't mean that I don't enjoy the film, simply means I didn't enjoy it as much as I thought I could have.


I'm kinda of the same way.

A lot of people hate on Punisher:Warzone,which I thought was pretty good myself. I just went to see Punisher kill some bad guys in incredibly violent and brutal ways that are humanly possible .


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## typhoon72 (Jun 20, 2011)

Ech?ux said:


> I'm the guy who understands what a movie is offering and finds a way to enjoy it in some way regardless as to whether or not it owns up to societies or everyone's personal expectations.
> 
> That said, I, too, have my expectations and get let down. Doesn't mean that I don't enjoy the film, simply means I didn't enjoy it as much as I thought I could have.



Splendid post.


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## Violent-nin (Jun 23, 2011)

None of them.


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## DanE (Jun 23, 2011)

I react differently, to different movies: if I'm going to see a science fiction movie im gonna be staring with my jaw dropped kinda like when I play video games, when is a scary movie I'm gonna be serious observing everything trying not to get jump scare and if its a an action movie I'm gonna be standing up screaming and kicking people saying" oh shit!" like the whole film(not in the theater tho, gotta respect other people)


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