# Jean-Claude Van Damme- The Movie



## masamune1 (Oct 22, 2008)

[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TAMobwJwFYY[/YOUTUBE]



Van Damme plays a washed-up movie action hero, aka himself, who loses custody of his daughter, has his roles stolen by Steven Segal, and has all sorts of financial problems. 

And then he gets caught up in a bank robbery. In Belgium. In his hometown, no less. And everyone thinks that he is the robber.

_*JCVD*_, also known as _*Van Dammage*_, is out in November. 

Early critical response has been very positive. Supposedly the man's greatest film perfomance ever. 

So...................

What do we all think? 

Or has this been posted already (too lazy to use Search, which sucks anyway)?


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## Dream Brother (Oct 22, 2008)

Hahah, I _have_ to see this. Thanks for posting.


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## Federer (Oct 22, 2008)

I really used to love his movies, when I was 9 years old. Man, what a terrible actor, losing his role to Steve Seagal is epic fail. 

Maybe he should have switched from action to comedy genre, earlier.


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## T4R0K (Oct 22, 2008)

Ever tried to understand the stuff he says ? 

In France, JCVD has almost become a cult-figure of stupid talk. So much it's safe to say he knows what he does and does it for the lulz.

I've heard good stuff about it too. I think it'll be his best movie, ever. (not really that hard)

GOTVERDOM, une fois !


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## Dimezanime88 (Oct 22, 2008)

Lol, being that I was a big fan of Van Damme, I'll definitely be looking forward to the movie. It looks good too.


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## CrazyMoronX (Oct 22, 2008)

Sounds awesome! 

Did you know that Van Damme is friends with Fedor? That places him as badass in my books alone.


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## masamune1 (Oct 22, 2008)

Sabakukyu said:


> I really used to love his movies, when I was 9 years old. Man, what a terrible actor, *losing his role to Steve Seagal is epic fail.*
> 
> Maybe he should have switched from action to comedy genre, earlier.



You _do_ realise that that was just a joke in the film, don't you?


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## fabio (Oct 22, 2008)

i heard that guy is a big pervert 
i love that guy
he can beat up chuck norris 
and he can dance with two ugly chics and beat up everyone in the bar like in kickboxer


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## Bathroom_Mop (Oct 22, 2008)

Haha. I used to be a big fan of his when I was younger. Then as I became older, i put him in the same category of Steven Segal and Dolph Lungren (sp), as fail action movie stars. The movies always looked so cheap and whenever you saw a cover for one of their movies, there was always an explosion in the background, then they were holding a gun.

Anyways, this one actually looks good, and I will try to watch it


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## Dream Brother (Oct 22, 2008)

fabio said:


> and he can dance with two ugly chics and beat up everyone in the bar like in kickboxer





Surely the most memorable part of that film.

I hope this new one is releasing in the UK, anyway.


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## fabio (Oct 22, 2008)

that is what i am talking about! YES! i think later this evening i'm going to some random roppongi club and dance like that.


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## blackshikamaru (Oct 22, 2008)

This looks pretty interesting.


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## MartialHorror (Oct 22, 2008)

Segal is worse......Van Dam at least LOOKS like he can kick your ass. Segal does too many backflips and shit in his movies for it to be believable......also, his movies look cheeper.

Still.....Ill see this definately.


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## ez (Oct 22, 2008)

I will be watching this. I was laughing hard from the first line alone. Sounds awesome.

The preview actually makes it like a decent, serious film.


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## Federer (Oct 23, 2008)

masamune1 said:


> You _do_ realise that that was just a joke in the film, don't you?



Ehh....yes, of course. I mean the movie is called Jean Claude van Damme, how can Steven Seagal play the main character. 

That's why I said that van Damme should have switched from genre, I mean losing your role to Steven Seagal (terrible actor) is fucking hilarious.


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## masamune1 (Oct 23, 2008)

Sabakukyu said:


> Ehh....yes, of course. I mean the movie is called Jean Claude van Damme, how can Steven Seagal play the main character.
> 
> That's why I said that van Damme should have switched from genre, I mean losing your role to Steven Seagal (terrible actor) is fucking hilarious.



But....that never happened.....


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## T4R0K (Oct 23, 2008)

BTW, guys, I hope you'll see the movie in french subbed in English. JC is awesome when he speaks french, with his Belgian accent, infusing words in English very naturally !


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## Violent-nin (Oct 23, 2008)

Dream Brother said:


> Surely the most memorable part of that film.
> 
> I hope this new one is releasing in the UK, anyway.



Best gif ever. 

Was going to make a thread for this but felt too lazy. 

I've always been a Van Damme fan, so I'll definitely be checking this out.


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## HumanWine (Oct 23, 2008)

I always though Seagel was major douche in all his movies. A douche to the point were I'd want the bad guys to win. His "one look no matter what role he plays" douchebag stare made it worst. 

Van Damme actually looked liked he tried his best to act in all his movies (even the shitty shitty, shit shit ones).


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## Bathroom_Mop (Oct 24, 2008)

Steven Segal is one of the worst action actors ever. In all his movies, all he would do is stand and make some remark. The bad guy would go for him, and he would do some quick hand movements and disable the guy. Besides shooting a gun, thats all he could do. No flexibility whatsoever, physicaly and acting wise. Van Damme actuall had some comedy in some of his roles, and had more diverse fighting scenes (atleast compared to Segal)


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## masamune1 (Oct 24, 2008)

Bathroom_Mop said:


> Steven Segal is one of the worst action actors ever. In all his movies, all he would do is stand and make some remark. The bad guy would go for him, and he would do some quick hand movements and disable the guy. Besides shooting a gun, thats all he could do. No flexibility whatsoever, physicaly and acting wise. Van Damme actuall had some comedy in some of his roles, and had more diverse fighting scenes (atleast compared to Segal)



C'mon. He was good in that Orange ad, at least:

[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p_16aJCc0B8[/YOUTUBE]


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## Bathroom_Mop (Oct 24, 2008)

^ His best performance ever


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## Sasuke X (Oct 24, 2008)

I, like others, loved Van Damme as a brat. I started to like him less as I grew up because it became clear to me he isn't a great actor and most of his movies are average. He does have some bloody good movies that I still watch, though, such as Timecop - his best acting performance.

I'll certainly have a look at this sooner or later - it actually looks decent.


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## masamune1 (Oct 25, 2008)

Bathroom_Mop said:


> ^ His best performance ever



It really is. Which is sad, but mostly because we now know that he can turn in half-decent performances (though his face still did'nt change that much).

Maybe they really should try and make that rom-com.


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## damnhot (Oct 25, 2008)

EPIC FAIL

just had to...


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## Dream Brother (Jan 23, 2009)

So, how was the movie? What did you guys think?

DVD hasn't released here yet.


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## MartialHorror (Jan 23, 2009)

Still haven't seen this. After watching "Bloodsport"(Reviewed it: *Will the government take over the banks?*) for the first real time, I realize Van Damme was cooler than Segal. Yes, his acting was pretty bad, but he had cooler fight scenes.

At his best, Seagal did Under Siege, which warrants a 3/4 star rating. Seagal had some charisma, but his fight scenes never did it for me. His movies were more for gun fighting and stabbings. I think his acting skills were better than Van Damme's earlier movies, but Van Damme got better than Seagal did worse.

Forthermore, Seagals movies SUCK badly now. Van Damme's are okay for DTV stuff.


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## Dream Brother (Feb 15, 2009)

I just saw this. It was surprisingly good -- very good, in fact. The key is the fact that the movie never settles for simple comedy (although there are many hilarious moments) and instead shoots for real drama at many points. It's a surreal sort of tragicomedy that examines the line between a man and his myth. That monologue showed off some serious emotion, and it's the first time I've ever seen Van Damme come even close to triggering pathos.

The more technical aspects to the movie are also interesting -- the constant shifting between past and present events serves to not only enhance the surreal feel but also actually works to capture the audience's curiousity. As a quote in the movie puts it, 
*Spoiler*: __ 



'the answer comes before the question'. You also have that now famous monologue where Van Damme breaks the fourth wall, or the absolutely lovely one-take opening.


 Some great diversity in structure going on here. The soundtrack is also surprisingly good, with Hard Times in particular being a perfect choice.

It's not perfect, and it sags in a few places, but overall it's great stuff.


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## Deleted member 84471 (Feb 16, 2009)

I saw the trailer for this the other day and thought it was a bog standard straight to video Van Damme flick. After reading the brief synopsis in the OP I just have to check this out.


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## Rampage (Feb 16, 2009)

i have to see this movie..van dame is a legend i love all his movies..thnxx for posting


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