# Engagements and Weddings



## DemonDragonJ (Dec 27, 2016)

Marriage is a very important institution in this world, and everyone who gets married wishes for their wedding to be perfect; I am no exception, as I wish to be married, eventually, and have already imagined many details of my wedding and how I wish for it to happen.

First, regarding my engagement, I feel that engagement rings are far too commonplace and cliche, so I would prefer to avoid giving one to my future spouse, because doing so implies that our relationship relation needs material objects to express our affection for each other; I could instead give her a different piece of jewelry. However, if I absolutely must do so, I would first ask my mother, grandmother, or aunt (my mother's sister) if I may have one of their rings (as they each have multiple rings) to use as my own engagement ring, to save money, before purchasing my own ring (although, as morbid and depressing as such an idea is, my grandmother is now eighty-six and I currently am not in a relationship, so she may not live to see me be married, so I may eventually have one of her rings without needing to ask her for it). Similarly, I will not seek a dowry from my future wife's family, since such a practice implies that they are paying me to take her away from them, and I intend to marry for love, not for material gain. Also, I will not ask my spouse to change their last name to mine, since I believe that they should be allowed to keep the name that their parents gave them at birth. I also do not intend to wear a wedding ring constantly, since I imagine that doing so would be very uncomfortable, and other people should be aware of my martial status only when I choose to allow them to be aware of it.

As for my actual wedding, I really wish to have it in the church of which I have been a member for my entire life; my church is very important to me, so I wish for it to be involved in my wedding in some way. I object to the idea of a bride's father walking her down the aisle of the church, as doing so implies that one man is giving her to another man; it is my desire that my future wife and I enter the church simultaneously, hand in hand, to show that we are equals. I absolutely will not repeat vows dictated to me by the priest who is conducting the ceremony; I will write my own personal vows and recite those.

For the reception, my wife and I will together form the menu of food and drinks; I would prefer to have an all-you-can-eat buffet, to save money without appearing to be miserly. One of the items will definitely be chicken wings with very hot hot sauce, since I am very fond of such items, and I also would prefer to avoid having a traditional wedding cake, because those are far too cliche, in my mind. When I was younger, I was not fond of cake; I would eat it, but it was not my favorite food item. Therefore, each year, on my birthday, for several consecutive years, my parents bought a large amount of miniature donuts and arranged them into a pyramid, so I believe that that would be a great idea as an alternative for a wedding cake. For music, my wife and I will each choose songs of which we are fond, likely alternating; first one of my choice, then one of her choice, and so forth; my wife can choose any songs that she desires, but I intend to choose all classic rock songs, with none of the pop music that I have heard at every other wedding that I have attended.

Unlike my engagement and wedding, I have not given my thought at all to my honeymoon; I can discuss the details of that when I actually am preparing to be married.

Forgive my lengthy post and self-aggrandizing, but this is a subject that is very important to me and to which I have given great thought, so I wished to share it in great detail with everyone.

What does everyone else have to say on this subject? For those users here who are not married but either wish to be or will soon be, what are your plans for your engagement and wedding? Have you worked out the details? What is your dream wedding? I eagerly await your responses to this thread.


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## Virus (Dec 27, 2016)

I dont want a wedding. I'd rather have a really good honeymoon than spend money on a wedding.


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## DemonDragonJ (Dec 27, 2016)

Neurovirulent said:


> I dont want a wedding. I'd rather have a really good honeymoon than spend money on a wedding.



Why do you say that?


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## Virus (Dec 27, 2016)

DemonDragonJ said:


> Why do you say that?



I don't know where you are from but personally I have been in so many big weddings that I have grown tired of them. Especially when you have to invite all your relatives which can be up to 150-200 people.

Reactions: Like 1


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## Stunna (Dec 27, 2016)

I want to get married some day.

I'll make the plans after I get the girl.

Reactions: Like 1


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## The Gr8 Destroyer (Dec 27, 2016)

You know you aren't officially married until you consummate the marriage. You should probably bang your wife on the alter right after pictures but before hors  d'oeuvres.


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## DemonDragonJ (Dec 27, 2016)

Mider T said:


> My dream wedding is crashing someone else's dream wedding, stealing the girl, and banning the former groom from the premises so we can get married.  The joy comes from the guy crying at his lost love and money spent on the shendig.  Also points if she's hot.



How can you say something such as that? What is wrong with you?


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## Kitsune (Dec 27, 2016)

I'm not into the ceremonial aspects of marriage, such as weddings and overblown anniversaries, but I'm looking forward to being married. I personally like monogamy and long-term bonds of partnership.


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## Aphrodite (Dec 27, 2016)

Im trying to figure out if this is a legit thread or if it's a troll thread.

One im sure whoever you decided to marry will want an engagement ring. It shows your committed to one another. I don't see why you have the right to decide that on your own. I actually don't see why your deciding this whole wedding thing on your own. You are dismissing many things the bride loves to have at her wedding. Not letting her father walk her down the aisle in my opinion is disrespectful to her and good luck finding a bride who don't mind you choosing everything including who walks her down the aisle. Also wedding rings.. i never saw a wedding that didnt have wedding rings as its a vow of your commitment to one another. Engagement ring is supposed to be something special not just a ring you got from a relative.

However i have no plans to get married when it's just as easy to live with someone instead of marriage that way if you want it over then its over and you leave. No need for divorce or anything.


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## Kusa (Dec 27, 2016)

Op, you have to find your partner first before putting so much thoughts into it. A lot things depend on the circumstances and your partner and many other things.

Also I don't see anything bad with some material things. Your marriage will not get shallow or materialistic just because you bought her a ring. You are making such a big deal about it.

As for me I am engaged and plan to get married.

I think marriage is really risky, but with the right partner definitely worth the risk. I used to not want to get married in the past but I totally changed my mind on that matter.

I want a nice wedding, does not have to very big but I definitely do want one and see myself also in a really pretty wedding dress.


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## Tiger (Dec 27, 2016)

Kusa said:


> Op, you have to find your partner first before putting so much thoughts into it.



Top tier advice.

We went over my opinion on all this in baconbits' relationship thread.


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## Monna (Dec 27, 2016)

I could tell by the title that this was a DDJ thread 

dude you really love weddings


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## DemonDragonJ (Dec 27, 2016)

Jane said:


> I could tell by the title that this was a DDJ thread



I am very glad that my threads have their own distinct style.



Jane said:


> dude you really love weddings



What is there to not enjoy about weddings? They are joyous occasions to celebrate two people being joined in a union of love.


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## Saru (Dec 29, 2016)

I'm not too hung up on marriage. It's something I picture for myself eventually, I guess, but I've given no thought to the logistics or anything.

I honestly don't even know what all you'd do to prepare (aside from picking a venue, catering, and inviting guests).

If I ever get married, it'll probably be up to M'lady what happens.


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## Steven Kinder (Dec 30, 2016)

Getting married and how you want to get married is completely your choice! If you don't believe in traditions then its not necessary to have a church wedding! Even my sister who got married last year  didn't have a church wedding as she was not a religious person and preferred to make it a small family affair instead of a grand traditional one.


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## FLORIDA MAN (Jan 2, 2017)

This thread made me think: was Billy Idol racist?


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## John Wick (Jan 4, 2017)

I'm getting married this year at some point, I decided long ago it was never going to be something too swanky but me and my GF would rather go do some charity work with the money we would have spent on our friends and family that aren't struggling in life compared to other people around the world.

bar a small reception paid for by my parents at a hotel and a legal ceremony we're not planning anything too lavish, yes it'll be at a nice venue and we'll be dressed nicely but compared to what other family members of mine have spent I'll be spending pennies on the pounds.

That said I have been trying to get permission from my mrs to arrive on an elephant so far we're at a firm no...

Reactions: Like 1


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## baconbits (Jan 4, 2017)

VAK said:


> I'm getting married this year at some point, I decided long ago it was never going to be something too swanky but me and my GF would rather go do some charity work with the money we would have spent on our friends and family that aren't struggling in life compared to other people around the world.
> 
> bar a small reception paid for by my parents at a hotel and a legal ceremony we're not planning anything too lavish, yes it'll be at a nice venue and we'll be dressed nicely but compared to what other family members of mine have spent I'll be spending pennies on the pounds.
> 
> That said I have been trying to get permission from my mrs to arrive on an elephant so far we're at a firm no...



How can she turn down the elephant?  Messes up the dress?


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## John Wick (Jan 4, 2017)

baconbits said:


> How can she turn down the elephant?  Messes up the dress?


it shits everywhere and costs like £12k plus food

Plus If I get the elephant she wants to dip into our savings and hire her favourite singer which is never going to fucking happen lol

Which is more than I'm spending on the wedding.

Reactions: Funny 1


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## Worm Juice (Jan 5, 2017)

In my opinion the whole wedding itself is a cliche. Changing and tweaking key elements of getting married won't change that.

As I am not religious at all, a wedding itself doesn't mean much to me. However after being 6 years together (4 years of those we are living together) I guess a party (wedding) to commemorate our love would be nice.

As for the party itself I wouldn't want to make it special/non cliche because that will only become a hassle. Cliche reception in the afternoon with the delightful sound of howling little kids, cliche photo shoot, followed by a cliche diner at some fancy place, followed by a cliche party at some nice cliche location. Getting cliche drunk at the cliche party, having a sentimental cliche dance, getting more cliche drunk. Cliche vomiting, cliche bridezilla. Cliche knife dance. Cliche cake. Cliche jumping on people. Cliche people running away. Cliche speeches of peoples, with occasional yelling to the cliche little kids to shut the fuck up and the astonishment that somebody like orangefucker (me) could get married and the husband is not insane (yet). Cliche douchebag band/dj plays cliche(60s,70s,80s) wedding music. Cliche dancing, cliche mingling of people who have never met each other. Cliche group of smokers outside with cliche fancy clothing feeling fancy and cool because they are smoking in fancy clothes. Cliche last dance and cliche leaving the party. Cliche arriving at a cliche hotel. Cliche being a drunk bitch, having cliche miserable wedding sex after a long tiresome day, cliche falling asleep. 

Now those are just the basics imagine having special demands and requests, too much hassle.



​


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## FLORIDA MAN (Jan 7, 2017)

DemonDragonJ said:


> Why are you asking that question, here? How is that at all relevant to this thread?



cuz 'white wedding'


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## Mider T (Jan 7, 2017)

Strawberry Juice said:


> Getting cliche drunk at the cliche party, having a sentimental cliche dance, getting more cliche drunk. Cliche vomiting


This isn't cliche, these are legitimate reactions.


Strawberry Juice said:


> cliche mingling of people who have never met each other


Who end up fucking one another or another marrying, legitimate sentiments.


wat said:


> cuz 'white wedding'


Red wedding.


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## DemonDragonJ (Jan 8, 2017)

wat said:


> cuz 'white wedding'



The name "White Wedding" has nothing to do with skin color or ethnicity; it refers to the fact that white is the color of purity and divinity, indicating that a wedding is a sacred union blessed by a deity or other divine power.


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## Monna (Jan 8, 2017)

it's a nice day to STAAAARRT AGAAAAIIINNNNNN


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## ЯƎWO⅃ᖷ (Jan 8, 2017)

Some days I want a big fancy wedding with a big fancy ring

At others I don't care and would just go to the courthouse and get it done. 

Pretty sure I won't have much say in what goes on at my wedding TBH. From my experience, the moms control it all.


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## John Wick (Jan 8, 2017)

ЯƎWO⅃ᖷ said:


> Some days I want a big fancy wedding with a big fancy ring
> 
> At others I don't care and would just go to the courthouse and get it done.
> 
> Pretty sure I won't have much say in what goes on at my wedding TBH. From my experience, the moms control it all.


yeah my mum and GF are pretty much in charge I'm along for the ride along with my dad and we're the ones that will be writing cheques and shit we've actually finally set a date this weekend aiming for the first week of july so I can have a stag do/ birthday party in vegas and LA.


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## DemonDragonJ (Jan 8, 2017)

ЯƎWO⅃ᖷ said:


> Pretty sure I won't have much say in what goes on at my wedding TBH. From my experience, the moms control it all.



I absolutely will not allow my mother to interfere with my wedding in any way, because it will be my wedding, not hers. She has already been married, so there is no reason for her to have any involvement with my wedding.


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## John Wick (Jan 8, 2017)

DemonDragonJ said:


> so there is no reason for her to have any involvement with my wedding.


So you don't want her turning up?

Reactions: Funny 1


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## DemonDragonJ (Jan 8, 2017)

VAK said:


> So you don't want her turning up?



Of course I shall wish for her to be present, but I will expect her to allow me to plan my wedding as I desire to do so.


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## Zyrax (Jan 9, 2017)

I will never have a wedding

Reactions: Agree 1


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## Kusa (Jan 10, 2017)

Zyrax Pasha said:


> I will never have a wedding


You can never know


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## Tiger (Jan 10, 2017)

Kusa said:


> You can never know



I don't know about that.

Some people do a pretty good job repelling the opposite sex to the point where placing a bet about the absence of marriage in their future is fairly safe and profitable.

Reactions: Like 1


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## baconbits (Jan 10, 2017)

DemonDragonJ said:


> Of course I shall wish for her to be present, but I will expect her to allow me to plan my wedding as I desire to do so.



Sometimes you need to let people have some say so that they'll be happy to be involved.  My wife and I planned our wedding but we let her mom do some stuff because it probably would have made her feel unwanted if she didn't get to do anything.  Same with all the parents, actually.


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## John Wick (Jan 10, 2017)

Kusa said:


> You can never know


you can however make an educated guess based upon facts.


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## John Wick (Jan 10, 2017)

DemonDragonJ said:


> I have noticed, at every wedding that I have attended, that the bride is easily-identifiable, because she is the only woman wearing white, but there is nothing to distinguish the groom from the other men, so, at my own wedding, I will certainly wear clothing that clearly and unmistakably identifies me as the groom; I will wear a white suit, while all the other men wear black, blue, or gray.
> 
> I wish to ask everyone: does the fact that I already have so many details of my wedding planned make me seem to be the male equivalent of a "bridezilla" (a "groomzilla," if I may coin a new term)? I certainly do not wish to be perceived in that way.
> 
> ...


That's why Indian weddings rock you know who the groom is cos he's wearing some elaborate get up like the bride


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## Kusa (Jan 10, 2017)

You can never know were not the right words

Not everyone needs a wedding and there is absolutely nothing wrong with deciding against it but I think someone should atleast wait to find the right partner first because then their opinion might change about the issue, which is also what happened to me.


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## John Wick (Jan 10, 2017)

Kusa said:


> You can never know were not the right words
> 
> Not everyone needs a wedding and there is absolutely nothing wrong with deciding against it but I think someone should atleast wait to find the right partner first because then their opinion might change about the issue, which is also what happened to me.


a mate of mine eloped, I'm considering it since after realising what a wedding costs it'd be cheaper


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## Zyrax (Jan 10, 2017)

Kusa said:


> You can never know were not the right words
> 
> Not everyone needs a wedding and there is absolutely nothing wrong with deciding against it but I think someone should atleast wait to find the right partner first because then their opinion might change about the issue, which is also what happened to me.


I was talking about a  Wedding, not Marriage

Reactions: Dislike 1


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## Kusa (Jan 10, 2017)

I know that Zyrax 

I still think a future partner who might want to have one could influence you to want a wedding too or maybe not


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## ~M~ (Jan 10, 2017)

Marriage is a religious institution so I have reservations about getting married as a homosexual


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## Tiger (Jan 10, 2017)

It _was_ a religious institution. It has since become a financial institution. 

Just get married on a beautiful beach somewhere instead of a church.

Reactions: Agree 2 | Informative 1


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## DemonDragonJ (Jan 10, 2017)

VAK said:


> a mate of mine eloped, I'm considering it since after realising what a wedding costs it'd be cheaper



I like to save money, but I also am very fond of being the center of attention (for positive reasons, not for negative reasons), so I will need to find a way to balance those desires.


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## Deleted member 235437 (Jan 11, 2017)

VAK said:


> That's why Indian weddings rock you know who the groom is cos he's wearing some elaborate get up like the bride


Indian weddings are so beautiful, I hope to be invited to one one day so I can have an excuse to wear a sari


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## DemonDragonJ (Jan 11, 2017)

I have been reading various articles online about wedding advice, but they are all intended for women, which implies that men do not care about weddings, or simply are not as concerned with them as are women. What does everyone else here have to say about that?


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## White Wolf (Jan 11, 2017)

I like the idea of having a nice wedding and getting married, tho with my side of the family being small would need a woman with 70 siblings to even remotely fill up a room in any way shape or form.


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## John Wick (Jan 11, 2017)

Khaleesi said:


> Indian weddings are so beautiful, I hope to be invited to one one day so I can have an excuse to wear a sari


you'd love my mums wardrobe, she has over 1000 sari's that she's collected over a lifetime many of which she's only worn once.


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## Tiger (Jan 11, 2017)

DemonDragonJ said:


> I have been reading various articles online about wedding advice, but they are all intended for women, which implies that men do not care about weddings, or simply are not as concerned with them as are women. What does everyone else here have to say about that?



Some 30 year old men love anime, but they still cater their anime to 15 year olds, because it's the major target audience. 

We've been telling you this whole time that it's ok to be passionate about your future wedding, but odds are your future bride will be more adamant things are done a way that you may not agree with. And you'll lose that argument 9 times out of 10.



White Wolf said:


> I like the idea of having a nice wedding and getting married, tho with my side of the family being small would need a woman with 70 siblings to even remotely fill up a room in any way shape or form.



Sounds like a good recipe for a destination wedding.


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## DemonDragonJ (Jan 12, 2017)

I wonder if I should have a bachelor party before my wedding? I do not care whether or not I have one, but I feel that I would rather have a rehearsal dinner the night before the wedding, instead, because those are much more elegant and sophisticated, while bachelor parities are stereotyped (whether fairly or unfairly) as being rowdy and uncouth.



Law said:


> We've been telling you this whole time that it's ok to be passionate about your future wedding, but odds are your future bride will be more adamant things are done a way that you may not agree with. And you'll lose that argument 9 times out of 10.



Why do you say that? What will my bride-to-be do if I disagree with her: not marry me?


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## Tiger (Jan 12, 2017)

What will you do when your bride-to-be has her dream wedding all planned out for years and years before meeting you and it doesn't fall in line with your ideas of what would make a good wedding? Not marry her?

You'll do what every other guy has done since the beginning of time. You'll say "yes dear", and learn a valuable lesson for the future about picking your battles, or you'll fight about it and then lose that fight and say "yes dear", and learn a valuable lesson for the future about picking your battles.

Reactions: Like 1


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## baconbits (Jan 12, 2017)

Khaleesi said:


> Indian weddings are so beautiful, I hope to be invited to one one day so I can have an excuse to wear a sari





VAK said:


> you'd love my mums wardrobe, she has over 1000 sari's that she's collected over a lifetime many of which she's only worn once.



Went to an Indian wedding over the summer because the groom was one of my friends.  I have to admit he had some cool clothes on.  I couldn't have pulled it off, tho.

@DemonDragonJ , one of the things some autistic people struggle with is what I like to call an "all or nothing" perspective.  Basically you tend to think of things as being one way or another without seeing the gradients in between.  What everyone is trying to say is that no matter who you marry you're going to have to agree to compromise on some of the things you want if you want to have a healthy relationship and a wedding is part of that compromise.  Does that mean you'll get nothing of what you want?  I would hope not.  But it means that you have to be willing to have a give and take.


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## DemonDragonJ (Jan 12, 2017)

baconbits said:


> @DemonDragonJ , one of the things some autistic people struggle with is what I like to call an "all or nothing" perspective.  Basically you tend to think of things as being one way or another without seeing the gradients in between.  What everyone is trying to say is that no matter who you marry you're going to have to agree to compromise on some of the things you want if you want to have a healthy relationship and a wedding is part of that compromise.  Does that mean you'll get nothing of what you want?  I would hope not.  But it means that you have to be willing to have a give and take.



You are definitely not the first person to say this to me, and I doubt that you shall be the last; my parents have certainly told me that many times.


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## baconbits (Jan 12, 2017)

DemonDragonJ said:


> You are definitely not the first person to say this to me, and I doubt that you shall be the last; my parents have certainly told me that many times.



Then maybe you're already working on this issue.  Just try to work on it even in issues like this.  It matters the most in areas you care about the most to be honest.  I have a bit of a problem with this myself, so I'm working on this as well.


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## FLORIDA MAN (Jan 12, 2017)

i don't 

also im pretty sure I'll put myself up for sale for a green card marriage soon


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## DemonDragonJ (Jan 12, 2017)

Law said:


> What will you do when your bride-to-be has her dream wedding all planned out for years and years before meeting you and it doesn't fall in line with your ideas of what would make a good wedding? Not marry her?
> 
> You'll do what every other guy has done since the beginning of time. You'll say "yes dear", and learn a valuable lesson for the future about picking your battles, or you'll fight about it and then lose that fight and say "yes dear", and learn a valuable lesson for the future about picking your battles.



I, also, have had my dream wedding planned out for years, so why can it not be my future wife who says "yes, dear" to me?


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## FLORIDA MAN (Jan 12, 2017)

ur both gonna have to bite the bullet and say that to each other but unless u get a really laissez-faire lady gender roles in western society dictate ull concede to her whims more than vice versa


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## baconbits (Jan 12, 2017)

wat said:


> ur both gonna have to bite the bullet and say that to each other but unless u get a really laissez-faire lady gender roles in western society dictate ull concede to her whims more than vice versa



I don't know about that.  I don't concede more to my wife.  We're about equal.  I refuse to be a whipped husband.

Reactions: Like 2


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## DemonDragonJ (Jan 12, 2017)

baconbits said:


> I don't know about that.  I don't concede more to my wife.  We're about equal.  I refuse to be a whipped husband.



I like your attitude on this subject, BaconBits; my father is not "whipped," and I certainly will not be, either.


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## Deleted member 198194 (Jan 12, 2017)

~M~ said:


> Marriage is a religious institution so I have reservations about getting married as a homosexual


marriage is about as religious an institution as halloween is a holiday


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## A Optimistic (Jan 12, 2017)

Kusa said:


> I think marriage is really risky, but with the right partner definitely worth the risk. I used to not want to get married in the past but I totally changed my mind on that matter.



Basically this.

Not interested in marriage now but hopefully one day I meet someone who I fall inlove with that changes my mind.


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## Tiger (Jan 12, 2017)

Believing acquiescing to your fiancee's dreams about her wedding makes you a whipped husband is terribly archaic and downright tragic.

DDJ, I foresee a lot of passive aggressive fights in your future as you struggle not to be 'whipped', like a junior high student.


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## baconbits (Jan 12, 2017)

Law said:


> Believing acquiescing to your fiancee's dreams about her wedding makes you a whipped husband is terribly archaic and downright tragic.
> 
> DDJ, I foresee a lot of passive aggressive fights in your future as you struggle not to be 'whipped', like a junior high student.



I see what you're saying but DDJ is reading this like "bow down to her wishes and never say a word" because he has AONM.  An all or nothing mindset.  To me he needs to learn how to negotiate.  What does she want?  What does he want?  Is there a middle ground?  For him growth is realizing there is a middle ground.

Reactions: Like 1


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## DemonDragonJ (Jan 13, 2017)

baconbits said:


> I see what you're saying but DDJ is reading this like "bow down to her wishes and never say a word" because he has AONM.  An all or nothing mindset.  To me he needs to learn how to negotiate.  What does she want?  What does he want?  Is there a middle ground?  For him growth is realizing there is a middle ground.



Of course I can negotiate, but I do not wish to have a wife who is a control freak; I wish to have control of my own life, and that includes being able to have control over my own wedding. So much attention is given to brides at weddings that some people seem to forget that a wedding is the groom's big day, as well, and I intend to let no one forget that my wedding will be an important day, for me.


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## FLORIDA MAN (Jan 13, 2017)

DemonDragonJ said:


> Of course I can negotiate, but I do not wish to have a wife who is a control freak;* I wish to have control of my own life, and that includes being able to have control over my own wedding*. So much attention is given to brides at weddings that some people seem to forget that a wedding is the groom's big day, as well, and I intend to let no one forget that my wedding will be an important day, for me.



but it's not "your own"

it's not ddj's wedding

it's ddj and ddj's wife's wedding

Reactions: Like 2


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## Tiger (Jan 13, 2017)

"I don't want a control freak for a wife. Because two control freaks in a marriage is too many."

Reactions: Funny 2


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## baconbits (Jan 13, 2017)

DemonDragonJ said:


> Of course I can negotiate, but I do not wish to have a wife who is a control freak; I wish to have control of my own life, and that includes being able to have control over my own wedding. So much attention is given to brides at weddings that some people seem to forget that a wedding is the groom's big day, as well, and I intend to let no one forget that my wedding will be an important day, for me.



Very selfish mentality, DDJ.  You have to think of your partner as well.  Until you can do that its hard to see how you can have a healthy relationship.


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## Mider T (Jan 13, 2017)

DemonDragonJ said:


> I, also, have had my dream wedding planned out for years, so why can it not be my future wife who says "yes, dear" to me?


Lol you've never had a girlfriend have you?

Reactions: Like 1


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## baconbits (Jan 13, 2017)

I wish I could give you a user label.  Maybe that should be a "ITT..." idea.  Yours would be "goes around with a tank of gasoline looking for a fire".


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## DemonDragonJ (Jan 13, 2017)

wat said:


> but it's not "your own"
> 
> it's not ddj's wedding
> 
> it's ddj and ddj's wife's wedding





baconbits said:


> Very selfish mentality, DDJ.  You have to think of your partner as well.  Until you can do that its hard to see how you can have a healthy relationship.



It will be easy to compromise about the food served and the music played at my wedding, because my spouse-to-be and I can each add items of our own choosing, but what if my partner has a specific location where they wish to be married? It would not be easy for me to abandon my dream of being married in the church of which I have been a member for my entire life. After that, I would have no difficulty compromising on issues such as what color to paint a room, what type of furnishings a room should have, and so forth, but my wedding is very important, so I wish for it to be as perfect as it possibly can be.



Mider T said:


> Lol you've never had a girlfriend have you?



Of course I have; I simply have never had a serious or long-lasting relationship, regrettably.



Law said:


> "I don't want a control freak for a wife. Because two control freaks in a marriage is too many."



Yes, that is a very accurate assessment of my mentality on this issue.


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## Worm Juice (May 28, 2019)

Worm Juice said:


> In my opinion the whole wedding itself is a cliche. Changing and tweaking key elements of getting married won't change that.
> 
> As I am not religious at all, a wedding itself doesn't mean much to me. However after being 6 years together (4 years of those we are living together) I guess a party (wedding) to commemorate our love would be nice.
> 
> ...




Ouch painful


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## Sunrider (May 28, 2019)

I think there was an _Adam Ruins Everything_ episode about how modern weddings exist mostly to get us to shell out tens of thousands of dollars.

(EDIT: I was right, _Adam Ruins Weddings_, season 1, ep 15).
**


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## Atlantic Storm (May 28, 2019)

nice to see nothing has changed since 2015


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