# You vs first chapter naruto



## Chaosgod777 (Feb 9, 2010)

naruto enters your house while your alone in it and screams he will tear you apart and prove his strengh.naruto just gets what he has in the first chapter no kage bunshin just some ninja equipment im sure he could just barely use and his self


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## Tegami (Feb 9, 2010)

Well, he'd beat me with no sweat. >.>


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## Genyosai (Feb 9, 2010)

It goes like this:
[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BmzyaOMQ5go[/YOUTUBE]

Just imagine me as Seagal, and Naruto as the noob.


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## Chaosgod777 (Feb 9, 2010)

Vampire Freak said:


> Well, he'd beat me with no sweat. >.>



use some of  your rage lol!


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## Tegami (Feb 9, 2010)

I have non. >.> 

Wait, it might go like this:

Me *Slap*
Him *Punch*
Me *Fly in the air*
Him *ROFL*
Me *Kick*
Him *Ouch!*
Him *Another punch*
Me *Dead >.>

Can't see me winning.


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## Chaosgod777 (Feb 9, 2010)

Vampire Freak said:


> I have non. >.>
> 
> Wait, it might go like this:
> 
> ...



maybe your being too gentle and didnt tought of kicking him in the nuts...


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## Tegami (Feb 9, 2010)

That would be inappropriate. O.o

Hehe, no that's just too harsh. >.> I wike him.


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## CrazyMoronX (Feb 9, 2010)

I'd pull up some porn off the Internet to stun him, then stab him with my knife.


Easy.


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## Chaosgod777 (Feb 9, 2010)

Vampire Freak said:


> That would be inappropriate. O.o
> 
> Hehe, no that's just too harsh. >.> I wike him.



but not like in a way you wud like him to hurt you...right?...hope no...


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## Tegami (Feb 9, 2010)

Sure not.
Fine fine, I'll charm him. Muwahaha, but problem is, I don't know how. >.>


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## Chaosgod777 (Feb 9, 2010)

ill beat him really hard and tell  him to unconditionally love you or he will see me mad...


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## paulatreides0 (Feb 9, 2010)

gun

I win


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## Shock Therapy (Feb 9, 2010)

i remind him of sasuke and he starts hyperventilating in which case i bash his head in with a hammer and/or stab him with a kitchen knife.


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## jazz189 (Feb 9, 2010)

Do I get to use my gun?

If so I win

If not he'll kick my ass, cause this was before Naruto became the pussy.


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## Sazabi24 (Feb 9, 2010)

I show him the chapter of himself hyperventilating, he hyperventilates to death while thinking of his future.


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## Crimson King (Feb 9, 2010)

I pick up my gun and shoot him.


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## Xaosin (Feb 9, 2010)

I tell him of his future to come.

And well he's hyperventilating ,I beat him with a frying pan.

He'll thank me for it someday.


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## hammer (Feb 9, 2010)

chap one before he gets kage bunshins?


he gets owned


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## Kurou (Feb 9, 2010)

he steps into my house..and explodes because only the truly awesome may enter 

if he some how manages to make it to me he can get a taste of my fist full of infinite bullets justice


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## Herekic (Feb 9, 2010)

everyone in the OBD dies.

fucking sakura was able to beat down battle hardened men without a problem.

everyone who says they'd get their gun:

you'd have  shuriken in your neck before you ever get the chance.


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## Glued (Feb 9, 2010)

I die, simple as that.


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## Crimson King (Feb 9, 2010)

Herekic said:


> everyone in the OBD dies.
> 
> fucking sakura was able to beat down battle hardened men without a problem.
> 
> ...



Guns>Ninja


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## paulatreides0 (Feb 9, 2010)

Herekic said:


> everyone in the OBD dies.
> 
> fucking sakura was able to beat down battle hardened men without a problem.
> 
> ...



rofl, hyello my sweet, sweet M-4A1 Carbine


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## CrazyMoronX (Feb 9, 2010)

Electronic erotica > Naruto.


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## Herekic (Feb 9, 2010)

> Guns>Ninja



while that is entirely false, my point was that it doesn't matter, because you'd be dead before you lay hands on your gun.




> rofl, hyello my sweet, sweet M-4A1 Carbine




Hello shuriken to the throat before you can even reach for it.


again, what weapon you have means jack if you never get to use it.


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## Kurou (Feb 9, 2010)

Herekic said:


> while that is entirely false, my point was that it doesn't matter, because you'd be dead before you lay hands on your gun.
> 
> 
> 
> ...



stop hatin. just because you would die,and we would die in the situation you planned out for us doesn't mean we actually die. i'd like to see naruto stop a fist full of justice.


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## Crimson King (Feb 9, 2010)

Herekic said:


> *snip*



He's barging into my house. My gun is next to me.


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## Whiny cakes (Feb 9, 2010)

two words. sakura porn.


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## paulatreides0 (Feb 9, 2010)

Whiny cakes said:


> two words. sakuraNaruto porn.


Sasuke is afraid of cooties



Herekic said:


> while that is entirely false, my point was that it doesn't matter, because you'd be dead before you lay hands on your gun.
> 
> 
> 
> ...



you mean the gun strapped onto me and that I'm holding and ready to press the trigger for? not to mention i'm in a room behind a door. bullets in a straight line>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Naruto in a straight line


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## Herekic (Feb 9, 2010)

> He's barging into my house. My gun is next to me.




and you still need to pick it up, aim and shoot before he perforates your skull with a fist full of sharp metal.





> you mean the gun strapped onto me and that I'm holding and ready to press the trigger for? not to mention i'm in a room behind a door. bullets in a straight line>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Naruto in a straight line



you just hang around your house shouldering a carbine with your finger on the trigger?


there are institutions for people like you


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## Kurou (Feb 9, 2010)

Herekic said:


> and you still need to pick it up, aim and shoot before he perforates your skull with a fist full of sharp metal.



yeah because its not like he has to do the same with his kunai 

i mean really its not like he has to take it out of the pouch and come charging at me in a straight line


OH WAIT-


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## Mist Puppet (Feb 9, 2010)

I direct Naruto to hentai featuring him and Sasuke.

GG Naruto.


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## Herekic (Feb 9, 2010)

> yeah because its not like he has to do the same with his kunai
> 
> i mean really its not like he has to take it out of the pouch and come charging at me in a straight line




...

I said shuriken. those little steel ninja stars that are thrown at high speed, from a distance.

there will be no "charging" at you


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## Crimson King (Feb 9, 2010)

Herekic said:


> ...
> 
> I said shuriken. those little steel ninja stars that are thrown at high speed, from a distance.
> 
> there will be no "charging" at you



I have 2 doors between me and him. My gun is next to me. He tries to break open the door, I shoot. he dies.


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## Kurou (Feb 9, 2010)

Herekic said:


> ...
> 
> I said shuriken. those little steel ninja stars that are thrown at high speed, from a distance.
> 
> there will be no "charging" at you



same situation he still has to go into his pouch and throw them after taking them out,

Besides i'm just gonna stand there and let shurikens hit me because suddenly shurikens are to fast to dodge


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## Herekic (Feb 9, 2010)

> I have 2 doors between me and him. My gun is next to me. He tries to break open the door, I shoot. he dies.




and you know this how?

OP just says he enters your house.,

that could mean he comes bashing in through the window of whatever room you're in.





> Besides i'm just gonna stand there and let shurikens hit me because suddenly shurikens are to fast to dodge




you do remember you yourself are not a ninja, right?


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## Crimson King (Feb 9, 2010)

Herekic said:


> and you know this how?
> 
> OP just says he enters your house.,
> 
> ...



Yes, bash through my three layered window that also has a metal layer.

I shoot him.


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## Kurou (Feb 9, 2010)

Herekic said:


> and you know this how?
> 
> OP just says he enters your house.,
> 
> ...




you do know that people when in times of extreme danger have there senses increased due to adrenaline and that there is something called aim dodging right? its not like the shurikens are gonna be thrown in a straight line right?

i hope you also realize speed of a bullet>>>>>>>>speed of a thrown object like a shuriken or kunai.


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## Genyosai (Feb 9, 2010)

Herekic said:


> OP just says he enters your house.,



You missed out the part in the OP where it says Naruto screams he will tear you apart to prove his strength! That point, would be a good point at which to shoot him in the head.


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## paulatreides0 (Feb 9, 2010)

Herekic said:


> and you know this how?
> 
> OP just says he enters your house.,
> 
> ...


so we don't wear colorful clothing, jump around and run around on trees yelling at the top of our lungs and say believe it every two seconds and that's supposed to be a disadvantage....how????



Herekic said:


> and you still need to pick it up, aim and shoot before he perforates your skull with a fist full of sharp metal.
> 
> 
> 
> ...



its called being safe. when the narutards invade and you die, I will be the one laughing


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## Endless Mike (Feb 9, 2010)

Where's flying shadow to explain how he would own him with his kung fu?


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## Lina Inverse (Feb 9, 2010)

Megatron kills him


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## Wang Yuanji (Feb 9, 2010)

Endless Mike said:


> Where's flying shadow to explain how he would own him with his kung fu?



Probably runing one of his 100km sprints.

I`d grab a lighter and set him on fire, I mean chapter 1 means he`s made of paper


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## ChINaMaN1472 (Feb 9, 2010)

I yell something about Sakura liking him and then he proceeds to be my friend.  I backstab him later.


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## hammer (Feb 9, 2010)

what the hell can he do pre tajuu kage bunshin


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## Crimson King (Feb 9, 2010)

hammer said:


> what the hell can he do pre tajuu kage bunshin



Act like a retard and scream alot.


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## Eternal Pein (Feb 9, 2010)

Sexy Jutsu


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## shit (Feb 9, 2010)

him = guy with knife within 10 feet of me
me = guy with gun and bullets in seperate rooms within 100 feet

I give him 10 to 1


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## LazyWaka (Feb 9, 2010)

Depends, with prep it wouldn't be that hard. but without he would probably have no difficulty.



Hollowed Shinigami said:


> Sexy Jutsu



I take it back, I get raped....


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## realmathena1 (Feb 9, 2010)

Hollowed Shinigami said:


> Sexy Jutsu



In that form I would concede to a rape

wait........

No I wouldnt he is still a guy

The only 2 things of the Narutoverse I would allow myself to lose against to are either post timeskip Ino and Mizukage and MAYBE Anko and via Snu Snu only.


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## randomsurfer (Feb 10, 2010)

I'll give him a thousand years of pain attack.


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## Narcissus (Feb 10, 2010)

rawrawraw said:


> i remind him of sasuke and he starts hyperventilating in which case i bash his head in with a hammer and/or stab him with a kitchen knife.



Best answer in the thread.


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## FireEel (Feb 10, 2010)

I will die.

My first impression would be, "Who the fuck is that random kid shouting unknown Japanese in my house?"

I step into the living room to take a look, only to have a wild orange monkey-like blond kid screaming, "*DATTEBAYO!*" leap onto me and start beating me into a bloody pulp.

Then he goes to my room and steals my Konoha headband replica.


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## death1217 (Feb 10, 2010)

i just tell him sasuke loves madara and sakura is a lez my win


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## jazz189 (Feb 10, 2010)

death1217 said:


> i just tell him sasuke loves madara and sakura is a lez my win



Chapter 1 Naruto wouldn't know who Madara was, and would probably yell out how he knew Sasuke was gay.

Seriously though it might just be me viewing pre-timeskip Naruto and post-timeskip Naruto as two completely different characters.

One is decent, one is a pussy.


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## death1217 (Feb 10, 2010)

jazz189 said:


> Chapter 1 Naruto wouldn't know who Madara was, and would probably yell out how he knew Sasuke was gay.
> 
> Seriously though it might just be me viewing pre-timeskip Naruto and post-timeskip Naruto as two completely different characters.
> 
> One is decent, one is a pussy.



op said only his power and move set is from chap 1 he should still have current memories so just hearing about sasuke should make him pass out
well even if that doesn't work i can just say sakura is a lez or my bitch and his head would explode or i could just show him some hentai pics of sakura and i win via nosebleed death


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## Soledad Eterna (Feb 10, 2010)

I summon Vegeta, he kicks his ass for me.


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## LazyWaka (Feb 10, 2010)

veget0010 said:


> I summon Vegeta, he kicks his ass for me.



Horrible plan is horrible.

Vegeta would kill you himself for summoning him to do something so insignificant.

Vegeta: His power level, IT'S OVER NINE...teen? You summoned me here for this?!?! *proceeds to mercilessly kill you*.


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## jazz189 (Feb 10, 2010)

death1217 said:


> op said only his power and move set is from chap 1 he should still have current memories so just hearing about sasuke should make him pass out
> well even if that doesn't work i can just say sakura is a lez or my bitch and his head would explode or i could just show him some hentai pics of sakura and i win via nosebleed death



Oh so its the pussy that will be fighting this time, then I win by default.


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## death1217 (Feb 10, 2010)

waka0793 said:


> Horrible plan is horrible.
> 
> Vegeta would kill you himself for summoning him to do something so insignificant.
> 
> Vegeta: His power level, IT'S OVER NINE...teen? You summoned me here for this?!?! *proceeds to mercilessly kill you*.



19? thats an insult to 19 his power level is over .00000000000000000009 vegeta would be happy to remove trash like this from the universe


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## Shoddragon (Feb 11, 2010)

Herekic said:


> everyone in the OBD dies.
> 
> fucking sakura was able to beat down battle hardened men without a problem.
> 
> ...



because clearly we are all as bad as you right ? I'd love to see a shuriken get past my bullet proof vest and naruto dodge 8 delicious bullets from a glock as well as completely ignore my metal baseball bat. shuriken don't exactly go that fast that they cannot be dodged, especially from chapter 1 naruto.

shuriken don't go that deep if not only cut on the outside only.

naruto doesn't know my fucking house better than I do .


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## realmathena1 (Feb 11, 2010)

death1217 said:


> 19? thats an insult to 19 his power level is over .00000000000000000009 vegeta would be happy to remove trash like this from the universe



But he would always revive, because eithet God and the devil would be ashamed of having that thing in their realms.


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## Akatora (Feb 11, 2010)

well if we are to use what we got at home then before he got kage bushin I may win 

His kunai isn't bad, but my hammer should be superior to it, after all it's made to break rocks


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## Basilikos (Feb 11, 2010)

Shoddragon said:


> because clearly we are all as bad as you right ? I'd love to see a shuriken get past my bullet proof vest and naruto dodge 8 delicious bullets from a glock as well as completely ignore my metal baseball bat. shuriken don't exactly go that fast that they cannot be dodged, especially from chapter 1 naruto.
> 
> shuriken don't go that deep if not only cut on the outside only.
> 
> naruto doesn't know my fucking house better than I do .


He has his ninja gear with him. All it will take to kill off anybody in this thread is a single kunai with an explosive tag on the end.

Also, I doubt you wear a bullet proof vest while at home.   Even if you did wear one all Naruto would need to do is throw a shuriken or kunai at your throat or face and it's GG.


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## UsoppYusukeLuffy (Feb 11, 2010)

Yo guys do realize that uum even at the very beginning Naruto has the fox sealed inside himself right?

So if you were about to kill him the kyubi would help him.


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## Shoddragon (Feb 11, 2010)

UsoppYusukeLuffy said:


> Yo guys do realize that uum even at the very beginning Naruto has the fox sealed inside himself right?
> 
> So if you were about to kill him the kyubi would help him.



except the seal didn't break until the haku fight. good job at reading.

my bullet proof vest is relatively close by. naruto still isn't surviving my metal bat nor gun.

this match is a joke. the only people who would lose here are people with a very small house or people without weapons at home.


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## UsoppYusukeLuffy (Feb 11, 2010)

Shoddragon said:


> except the seal didn't break until the haku fight. good job at reading.
> 
> my bullet proof vest is relatively close by. naruto still isn't surviving my metal bat nor gun.
> 
> this match is a joke. the only people who would lose here are people with a very small house or people without weapons at home.


I bet if Naruto seriously get pissed off from being shot then the seal would break.Also he can probaly dodge that metal bat.

Wow im actually sticking up for Naruto


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## LazyWaka (Feb 11, 2010)

Shoddragon said:


> except the seal didn't break until the haku fight. good job at reading.
> 
> my bullet proof vest is relatively close by. *naruto still isn't surviving my metal bat* nor gun.
> 
> this match is a joke. the only people who would lose here are people with a very small house or people without weapons at home.



Really, a metal bat? Whats that going to do to him considering he is already stronger than chuck norris (thats right, I said Chuck norris. Deal with it. ) by this point.

I concede on the gun part though.


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## South of Hell (Feb 12, 2010)

The kid has Kunai... What do you think?


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## death1217 (Feb 12, 2010)

South of Hell said:


> The kid has Kunai... What do you think?



and he has the same accuracy of a monkey flinging his poop around 
yea he isn't winning against the average OBDer


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## Kurou (Feb 12, 2010)

UsoppYusukeLuffy said:


> I bet if Naruto seriously *get pissed off from being shot then the seal would break.*Also he can probaly dodge that metal bat.
> 
> Wow im actually sticking up for Naruto




one problem with that,being shot in the brain means all thought processes stop,he wouldn't be able to get pissed because his brain would stop working.

and people seem to forget naruto wasn't exactly an expert ninja. he barely had any skill which is why he kept repeating ninja academy.


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## Blackfeather Dragon (Feb 12, 2010)

KurouKetsu said:


> one problem with that,being shot in the brain means all thought processes stop,he wouldn't be able to get pissed because his brain would stop working.
> 
> and people seem to forget naruto wasn't exactly an expert ninja. he barely had any skill which is why he kept repeating ninja academy.



naruto was already a ninja and that enough deal with it or i'll deal with you  


i already know what computer you using


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## Kurou (Feb 12, 2010)

Blackfeather Dragon said:


> naruto was already a ninja and that enough deal with it or i'll deal with you
> 
> 
> i already know what computer you using



so? and naruto beating me in my own house,not happenin.


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## Blackfeather Dragon (Feb 12, 2010)

KurouKetsu said:


> so? and naruto beating me in my own house,not happenin.



naruto is getting closer


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## South of Hell (Feb 12, 2010)

death1217 said:


> and he has the same accuracy of a monkey flinging his poop


 So what's stopping him from jumping across the room and going stabby stabby or slitting your neck?


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## Kurou (Feb 12, 2010)

South of Hell said:


> So what's stopping him from jumping across the room and going stabby stabby or slitting your neck?



a bullet in his head.


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## UsoppYusukeLuffy (Feb 12, 2010)

KurouKetsu said:


> a bullet in his head.


Bet you woudn't grab your gun fast enough


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## Chaosgod777 (Feb 12, 2010)

UsoppYusukeLuffy said:


> Bet you woudn't grab your gun fast enough



bet naruto will keep screaming datebayo when he grabs his gun naruto will not know what it is.....


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## Blade (Feb 12, 2010)

Sazabi24 said:


> I show him the chapter of himself hyperventilating, he hyperventilates to death while thinking of his future.


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## Chaosgod777 (Feb 12, 2010)

Blackfeather Dragon said:


> naruto is getting closer



Naruto would beat YOU. but barely any other grown human been as when he was in that first episode


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## Kurou (Feb 12, 2010)

UsoppYusukeLuffy said:


> Bet you woudn't grab your gun fast enough



oh yeahbecause naruto is the embodiment of speed and stealth.

naruto characters aren't that fast.


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## Deleted member 45015 (Feb 12, 2010)

I don my Akatsuki coat.

Any attacks become ineffective at killing me until I remove it. Which I won't. 

I then proceed to introduce my kitchen knife set to Naruto's head and shoulder area.


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## Blackfeather Dragon (Feb 12, 2010)

Chaosgod777 said:


> Naruto would beat YOU. but barely any other grown human been as when he was in that first episode


but lets be for real he is already above peak human the first thing we are going to notice is a guy yelling in Japanese we go and boom dead


normally every fictional character is above peak human


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## Chaosgod777 (Feb 12, 2010)

Blackfeather Dragon said:


> but lets be for real he is already above peak human the first thing we are going to notice is a guy yelling in Japanese we go and boom dead
> 
> 
> normally every fictional character is above peak human



you saying he is like spike seagal from cowboy bebop? no naruto didnt had such thing as super precition or that much of stamina on the first episode. im sure any guy smart enough would just get there and hit his head with anything near,and dont make me start with the guns also the kunai and shuriken im sure naruto doesnt trowh that like bullseye,lets say he caughs you on the bathroom thats the only way i see him winning


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## Herekic (Feb 12, 2010)

> you saying he is like spike seagal from cowboy bebop? no naruto didnt had such thing as super precition or that much of stamina on the first episode. im sure any guy smart enough would just get there and hit his head with anything near,and dont make me start with the guns also the kunai and shuriken im sure naruto doesnt trowh that like bullseye,lets say he caughs you on the bathroom thats the only way i see him winning




..have you ever actually read naruto?

sakura is even weaker then naruto in fighting power.


she has:

EASILY beaten the crap out of grown, battle hardened thugs(naruto also very casually bashed down the two swordsman thugs) 

threw a kunai from like 50 feet away, pinning a falling naruto to a tree by his shirt. could you do that? can you name anyone who could do that?



naruto also has enough strength to jump like 30 feet straight up into the air easily, as well as knock experienced fighters out with a single casual hit.


and this was all with no powerups, he was as strong as he was in ep 1.


anyone who tries to fight him gets their head bashed in, you included.


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## Chaosgod777 (Feb 12, 2010)

Herekic said:


> ..have you ever actually read naruto?
> 
> sakura is even weaker then naruto in fighting power.
> 
> ...



fine fine, i wouldnt risk myself to suffer a bash from a low intelected blond japanese ninja wannabe ,i would grab the 45. gun in my desk besides me and shoot him on the chest and head several times ,have you ever seen somebody surviving that in the narutoverse,can you name anyone? that bashes anyone from there out ,including you.


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## Kurou (Feb 12, 2010)

Herekic said:


> ..have you ever actually read naruto?
> 
> sakura is even weaker then naruto in fighting power.
> 
> ...




anime dramatics and fodder. I've always noticed that about anime and manga. the fodder always tends to get knocked out easily so unless fodder can actually do something impressive it doesn't matter. but thats just my opinion.

that and you make general assumptions about people in the obd,people who you know nothing about, what if chaos or some other OBD'er can casually break through cement with one punch?,but eh what do i care


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## Chaosgod777 (Feb 12, 2010)

KurouKetsu said:


> anime dramatics and fodder. I've always noticed that about anime and manga. the fodder always tends to get knocked out easily so unless fodder can actually do something impressive it doesn't matter. but thats just my opinion.
> 
> that and you make general assumptions about people in the obd,people who you know nothing about, what if chaos or some other OBD'er can casually break through cement with one punch?,but eh what do i care



it resulsts that my straight punch can knock down people severally stronger and heavyer than me (more than 75 kilograms,and taller than 6.10 feet(about 1.85 meters) and choke a person in seconds if i get to the right spot quick enough ,i carry around a knife sometimes, i can also break things like wood chairs with just one kick or a good punch and damage old concrete (it hurst like shit later...) and incredibly durable glass..lol  naruto gets no chance,and im not hyping myself flying shadow way im saying pure canon feats from me.


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## Herekic (Feb 13, 2010)

> anime dramatics and fodder. I've always noticed that about anime and manga. the fodder always tends to get knocked out easily so unless fodder can actually do something impressive it doesn't matter. but thats just my opinion.
> 
> that and you make general assumptions about people in the obd,people who you know nothing about, what if chaos or some other OBD'er can casually break through cement with one punch?,but eh what do i care




Jumping 30 feet into the air wasn't "dramatics", it's how they travel. it is fact that they can do it.

haku isn't exactly a physical powerhouse, yet he broke gato's arm with one hand by SQUEEZING it. 

the thugs got beaten down because they are normal guys. naruto is a superhuman.

it was showing the difference between normal people and ninjas.






> fine fine, i wouldnt risk myself to suffer a bash from a low intelected blond japanese ninja wannabe ,i would grab the 45. gun in my desk besides me and shoot him on the chest and head several times ,have you ever seen somebody surviving that in the narutoverse,can you name anyone? that bashes anyone from there out ,including you.




Sakura can pin naruto to a tree from like 50 feet away while he was falling using a single kunai. she is weaker then naruto.


good luck getting to your gun, turning around and firing before the kunai gets to your face.


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## realmathena1 (Feb 13, 2010)

Herekic said:


> Jumping 30 feet into the air wasn't "dramatics", it's how they travel. it is fact that they can do it.
> 
> haku isn't exactly a physical powerhouse, yet he broke gato's arm with one hand by SQUEEZING it.
> 
> ...



Then I show Naruto the last 10 mangas and show him in the sissy Sasuke fangirl he will become, specially the episode when I lose the last piece of respect I had for him (the one when he hyperventilates for Sasuke), Naruto kills himself


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## Chaosgod777 (Feb 13, 2010)

Herekic said:


> Jumping 30 feet into the air wasn't "dramatics", it's how they travel. it is fact that they can do it.
> 
> haku isn't exactly a physical powerhouse, yet he broke gato's arm with one hand by SQUEEZING it.
> 
> ...





really you think narotu can stop yelling crap,open his bag of stuff and trow and easily dodgable kunai? thats stupid since naruto even being stronger than sakura,didnt meant he was better at trowing crap and using ninja equipment in fact i think he was worse than sakura


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## Kurou (Feb 13, 2010)

Herekic said:


> Jumping 30 feet into the air wasn't "dramatics", it's how they travel. it is fact that they can do it.
> 
> haku isn't exactly a physical powerhouse, yet he broke gato's arm with one hand by SQUEEZING it.
> 
> ...



not really. in order to break someones hand by squeezing it you have to have peak human,if not greater strength,.what is your reasoning for basing that haku isn't a physical power house? the way he looks? because if it is then that isn't any grounds at all.

second point,naruto beat the thugs with anime dramatics and so on and so forth. doesn't mean he's superhuman,for example yusuke from yuyu wasn't super human during the beginning of the show yet he was beating the crap out of thugs doesn't make him super human.

what makes you think people in the OBD couldn't react to a kunai being thrown at them or shuriken for that matter and then place a bullet in them?


----------



## Genyosai (Feb 13, 2010)

I think people just don't want to admit they'd be beaten by the little orange suited freak.


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## Shoddragon (Feb 13, 2010)

Herekic said:


> ..have you ever actually read naruto?
> 
> sakura is even weaker then naruto in fighting power.
> 
> ...




this is chapter 1 nauto before kage bunshin no jutsu. he was weak as fuck.


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## Chaosgod777 (Feb 13, 2010)

Genyosai said:


> I think people just don't want to admit they'd be beaten by the little orange suited freak.



its just that he looks like a guy in a fancy prison suit.its all orange


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## Kurou (Feb 13, 2010)

Genyosai said:


> I think people just don't want to admit they'd be beaten by the little orange suited freak.



nah,its just that naruto isn't as impressive as some people make him out to be.he was such a fail ninja even people in his own work of fiction called him an idiot. to top it off,this is our RL personas. we aren't bound to PIS like a lot of dumb villains.

i'm pretty sure the first thing you'd do if you saw some crazy japanese kid screaming and throwing shit at you,you'd get the fuck out of the way,the same as if someone was shooting at you an prepare some form out counter attack like stabbing him in the head when he walks through your room dorr and what not. you might even decide to shoot him between the eyes while he's screaming "he wants to be hokage".


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## Zaru (Feb 13, 2010)

I like how half of the people who post in this thread are apparently reality warpers.


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## Genyosai (Feb 13, 2010)

If Naruto came into my house screaming, how am I going to be that prepared?

It'd be like this:
NAURUTO:
*barges into my room*
I WILL DEFEAT YOU TO TEST MY STRENGTH! BELIEEEEEEEVE EEEEEEEEEEEEEET!

ME:
HOLY SHIT! LIKE, DUDE, WTF? KID WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOU... Wait, why are you dressed as Naru-*is killed*


On the other hand, if I'd read this thread first:
NAURUTO:
*barges into my room*
I WILL DEFEAT YOU TO TEST MY-

ME:
HOLY SHIT! WHAT THE FUCK! THE THREAD CAME TRUE! *realizes I might die*
Hey, Naruto, you want to beat me and become the best right? Well, I think you should look at this first... *stabs Naruto to death with knife*


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## Crimson King (Feb 13, 2010)

Genyosai said:


> On the other hand, if I'd read this thread first:
> NAURUTO:
> *barges into my room*
> I WILL DEFEAT YOU TO TEST MY-
> ...



My reaction would probably be this: 

NAURUTO:
*barges into my room*
I WILL DEFEAT YOU TO TEST MY-

Me: *picks up gun and empties clip in his face*


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## Pervy Fox (Feb 14, 2010)

That really all depends where I am, if Im far far away from my kitchen, I probably wont get a knife in time, and even if I do throw a knife in his face, he would probably throw a counter to block the knife or it could probably be a log


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## Inugami (Feb 14, 2010)

I would do something like this.

[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QTV4LM-FkDY[/YOUTUBE]


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## Herekic (Feb 15, 2010)

I think most of the people in this thread are either lying, or psychotic.

the thread in no way specifies that you are ready for him, or are expecting this to happen.


are you telling me if a fictional character(or really anyone barged into your room, you would just INSTANTLY go for a gun and try to shoot him? really?


the last time somebody threw you guys a suprise party, did it end with you pulling out the glock you always keep in your concealed holster and shooting all the guests? 


seriously, either people are BSing to hide the fact they know they would have no chance in hell in a fight here, or are plain out psychotic.


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## death1217 (Feb 15, 2010)

Herekic said:


> I think most of the people in this thread are either lying, or psychotic.
> 
> the thread in no way specifies that you are ready for him, or are expecting this to happen.
> 
> ...


this is the obd official home to psychotic serial killers since....well whenever it was started


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## Kathutet (Feb 15, 2010)

i'm dead lol.


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## Robert Haydn (Feb 15, 2010)

Herekic said:


> I think most of the people in this thread are either lying, or psychotic.
> 
> the thread in no way specifies that you are ready for him, or are expecting this to happen.
> 
> ...


Agreed, and I'd die so fast. I don't own a gun 
and I probably wouldn't be near my sword.


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## Azrael Finalstar (Feb 15, 2010)

Robert Haydn said:


> Agreed, and I'd die so fast. I don't own a gun
> and I probably wouldn't be near my sword.


What good would your sword do? two peak human samurai's with sharp katanas couldn't take him.


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## Robert Haydn (Feb 15, 2010)

hadomaru said:


> What good would your sword do? two peak human samurai's with sharp katanas couldn't take him.


In my room it would do plenty. There's no room at all to dodge
a sword, I could swing it in any direction and I'd be guaranteed
a hit after 2 to 4 swings. And who are these peak humans that 
lost to ch1 Naruto?


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## Shoddragon (Feb 15, 2010)

Herekic said:


> I think most of the people in this thread are either lying, or psychotic.
> 
> the thread in no way specifies that you are ready for him, or are expecting this to happen.
> 
> ...



I'm always expecting something to happen. not quite that otherguys bs of "sensing flies on the other side of the planet", but I am always ready to expect something. I obviously don't have bullet timing reaction speed or anything of the such, and I damn straight am not peak human, but chapter 1 naruto was definitely below peak human in strength, and he gets pierced by weapons just fine.
his skull is also not immune to a metal bat hitting it and breaking his face. stop wanking chapter 1 naruto, seriously . is it so hard to believe some people here keep weapons in their fucking room? besides, some random stranger in my house= he gets his knees blown the fuck off.


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## Azrael Finalstar (Feb 15, 2010)

Robert Haydn said:


> In my room it would do plenty. There's no room at all to dodge
> a sword, I could swing it in any direction and I'd be guaranteed
> a hit after 2 to 4 swings. And who are these peak humans that
> lost to ch1 Naruto?


he could disarm you. He is a ninja.


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## Shoddragon (Feb 15, 2010)

hadomaru said:


> he could disarm you. He is a ninja.



I cannot take you seriously, this post sounds riddled with sarcasm. Naruto was a massive fail ninja. disarm most of us my ass. he doesn't know our houses better than we do. also: a full on katana hit is slicing naruto in half or lopping his head off, just for reference. back in ancient japan, even with their terrible steel, there were some swords capable of slicing through MULTIPLE people with 1 slash.  a modern katana would rape naruto.

it would be even worse at my friends house considering he has weapons all over the place as well as a couple of guns.


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## Magnificent (Feb 15, 2010)

Well the setting isn't much helping here, since he is bashing into my room and I will be like WTF. 

Him being a failure 12 year old boy who never showed any talent using ninja weapons nor show any impressive feats helps me a lot though. My bed is located near my door, and I use my laptop over there in my free time. If he barges in and yells a few words before attempting to attack me, then I have a really good chance to react fast enough to jump to him and end up in jamming his teeth up his nose.

This can really vary according to the way the room furniture is placed.



In a straight outright fight I would dominate him


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## Herekic (Feb 15, 2010)

> In my room it would do plenty. There's no room at all to dodge
> a sword, I could swing it in any direction and I'd be guaranteed
> a hit after 2 to 4 swings. And who are these peak humans that
> lost to ch1 Naruto?




So you're going to somehow do better then the two experienced fighters/killers naruto casually crushed?





> I'm always expecting something to happen. not quite that otherguys bs of "sensing flies on the other side of the planet", but I am always ready to expect something. I obviously don't have bullet timing reaction speed or anything of the such, and I damn straight am not peak human, but chapter 1 naruto was definitely below peak human in strength, and he gets pierced by weapons just fine.
> his skull is also not immune to a metal bat hitting it and breaking his face. stop wanking chapter 1 naruto, seriously . is it so hard to believe some people here keep weapons in their fucking room? besides, some random stranger in my house= he gets his knees blown the fuck off.




chapter 1 naruto in terms of power, doesn't mean we can't use feats from a little later for him(as long as it's just basic fighting strength before he got any upgrades)

between chapter 1 and wave arc, naruto got NO power boosts, he just learned KB.

that doesn't change the fact he could KO the two samurai with one hit.


chapter 1 naruto is that strong. hell, SAKURA can beat down normal human men. 


he would break your face. admit it. 






> I cannot take you seriously, this post sounds riddled with sarcasm. Naruto was a massive fail ninja. disarm most of us my ass. he doesn't know our houses better than we do. also: a full on katana hit is slicing naruto in half or lopping his head off, just for reference. back in ancient japan, even with their terrible steel, there were some swords capable of slicing through MULTIPLE people with 1 slash. a modern katana would rape naruto.




like the two katanas, wielding by EXPERIENCED KILLERS, that naruto easily beat down?

again I remind you this is the SAME naruto from ch 1, he had not gotten even a single power boost.





> Well the setting isn't much helping here, since he is bashing into my room and I will be like WTF.
> 
> Him being a failure 12 year old boy who never showed any talent using ninja weapons nor show any impressive feats helps me a lot though. My bed is located near my door, and I use my laptop over there in my free time. If he barges in and yells a few words before attempting to attack me, then I have a really good chance to react fast enough to jump to him and end up in jamming his teeth up his nose.
> 
> ...





Again, the same level naruto you are fighting here handed two experienced, armed killers their asses EASILY


You are not dominating anything, you try to fight him and you're going to have your face put into the back of your skull.




This thread is amazing, seriously. I don't know if it's the naruto hate or the OBD's legendary self-wanking(example: blue with katana>10 hyenas), but the fact people think they are going to be able to actuall phsically beat down naruto is just hilarious.


----------



## Magnificent (Feb 15, 2010)

It's a rule you only use the feats up to the specified time the OP states. Chapter 1 is chapter 1. And he even says before he learns KB. Seriously, what can he do to me? Sexy no jutsu?


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## death1217 (Feb 15, 2010)

Mihawk582 said:


> It's a rule you only use the feats up to the specified time the OP states. Chapter 1 is chapter 1. And he even says before he learns KB. Seriously, what can he do to me? Sexy no jutsu?



i don't care if he is originally a  guy he pulls off sexy no jutsu he is getting raped


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## Shoddragon (Feb 15, 2010)

Herekic said:


> So you're going to somehow do better then the two experienced fighters/killers naruto casually crushed?
> 
> 
> 
> ...



yea it does, especially when the OP states a specific timeline for feats ( up to before naruto learns KB).


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## Pervy Fox (Feb 15, 2010)

Just a perticular question, what if you guys dont have guns? (which you probably dont) lol you guys are just saying that just to feel so mighty and protective with your shoty. Even if you do shoot him, then that means you cant take him on one on one, that proves that Naruto can beat just about anyone in combat here. This thread amuses me. lol


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## Agmaster (Feb 15, 2010)

To everyone saying they will rape, I ponder what hiring a really good cosplayer to break into your place would result in.  Film it for the lulz.


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## Shoddragon (Feb 15, 2010)

Pervy Fox said:


> Just a perticular question, what if you guys dont have guns? (which you probably dont) lol you guys are just saying that just to feel so mighty and protective with your shoty. Even if you do shoot him, then that means you cant take him on one on one, that proves that Naruto can beat just about anyone in combat here. This thread amuses me. lol



well, I do actually have a gun so yea. I could take him one on one. thats why i have a nice metal bat in my room. not everyone in here is the next fucking bruce lee dude. but chapter 1 naruto wasn't anything that special.

@Agmaster: depends on if the cosplayer is a dude or a chick.


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## Pervy Fox (Feb 15, 2010)

Shoddragon said:


> well, I do actually have a gun so yea. I could take him one on one. thats why *i have a nice metal bat in my room.* not everyone in here is the next fucking bruce lee dude. but chapter 1 naruto wasn't anything that special.
> 
> @Agmaster: depends on if the cosplayer is a dude or a chick.



Naruto could easily dodge that lol


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## Shoddragon (Feb 16, 2010)

Pervy Fox said:


> Naruto could easily dodge that lol



again with your ignorance. its MY HOUSE, not an open field. he isn't dodging it in my narrow room I assure you. as I said, you nor naruto know my house like I do. I know where I can fight advantageously. try again.


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## Zaru (Feb 16, 2010)

This also helps

He blitzes an at least peak human (by later showings of similar ranking ninjas superhuman) that is wielding something way more deadly than a "metal bat" and *knocks him back several meters*.


Nobody here would react to that. You'd all be kicked through a wall and lose with a broken jaw and possibly spine.


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## Nimademe (Feb 16, 2010)

I beat Naruto by bribing him with copious amounts of noodles.

I'm not inane enough to think I can beat him.


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## Kimimaro (Feb 16, 2010)

I think the majority of people here are severely overestimating their capabilities. I honestly doubt any one of you could win this match.


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## Lucifeller (Feb 16, 2010)

First off, my house is cramped. Think 6x6 rooms with lots of furniture (making them more 4x4 than 6x6) for most of it. That means Naruto can forget about dodging. His speed thus becomes inconsequential.

Second, I am a weapons fanatic, and have replicas in almost all rooms. They may not be the real thing, but are still pointy pieces of steel. And being two meters tall, my reach is a lot longer than his own.

Third, I have a chainsaw. And that, my friends, is all that matters. :ho.


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## Zaru (Feb 16, 2010)

@ thinking you can start up a chainsaw before you die


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## Lucifeller (Feb 16, 2010)

Given how Naruto is prone to rants, how I HATE Naruto as a character, and how OP specifies he's going to barge in and yell threats before doing anything? Yeah, chances are good I can start a chainsaw.

And frankly, I don't care if I die so long as I get to mutilate him into a wheelchair. I hate him that much, and if there's one thing I'm good at, it's taking damage - having practiced a bunch of grappling disciplines including greco-roman did make me really resistant to pain.


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## Zaru (Feb 16, 2010)

Because he'll let you walk up to a weapon in the timespan of yelling "I'll tear you apart"

Do you move at supersonic speeds or something?


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## Lucifeller (Feb 16, 2010)

Zaru said:


> Because he'll let you walk up to a weapon in the timespan of yelling "I'll tear you apart"
> 
> Do you move at supersonic speeds or something?



How does he know a chainsaw is a weapon? Does it look like any weapon in the Narutoverse? For all he knows, I'm grabbing a lump of iron to defend myself in a pinch.

Also, out of curiosity, would Naruto know he needs to avoid being sprayed with mace or touched by a tazer? Both are in my mother's possession (I share the house with her because she has financial troubles), and easily reached in the living room, and both tend to be easy to use in a pinch.


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## Nimademe (Feb 16, 2010)

You die from chainsaw fumes.


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## Zaru (Feb 16, 2010)

Lucifeller said:


> How does he know a chainsaw is a weapon? Does it look like any weapon in the Narutoverse? For all he knows, I'm grabbing a lump of iron to defend myself in a pinch.
> 
> Also, out of curiosity, would Naruto know he needs to avoid being sprayed with mace or touched by a tazer? Both are in my mother's possession (I share the house with her because she has financial troubles), and easily reached in the living room, and both tend to be easy to use in a pinch.



So let me get this straight.

You will walk by killing intent naruto, walk to the living room, grab a tazer, walk back to naruto and hit him with it.

Yeah I'm sure he's just gonna wait while you do so.



Earth to OBD, chapter 1 naruto can jump in your face before you even realize what's going on.


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## Lucifeller (Feb 16, 2010)

Nimademe said:


> You die from chainsaw fumes.



As I said, so long as I get to mutilate him beforehand, I don't mind dying. That part about me wanting to inflict bodily harm on him seems to go right over people's heads.

Hell, I'm less hostile today to him than I was a couple months ago. Back then, I'd have answered to a topic like this with 'I kick him in the balls while he's saying he'll rip me apart and then curbstomp his teeth off with extreme prejudice', because I'm not a freaking manga character, and I'm not letting someone who makes me see RED HATE HAZE run his mouth right in front of me, I'm going to charge first and get violent, and to hell with those claiming a crotch shot at an opponent doing his speech is unfair.

And good luck dodging that in a house like mine.

I'll repeat it for people who still don't get it. I hate Naruto the person so much, I'd pass up on any chance to escape from death just to inflict as much pain as humanly possible on him.

The way in which I inflict said pain doesn't matter, I'm willing to use anything from steel toed boots to smelly socks down his throat to a cheese grater to the face just to see him cry in a heap on the floor. And I don't care even if I get stabbed in the process. What I care about isn't surviving, it's showing him Hell.



> So let me get this straight.
> 
> You will walk by killing intent naruto, walk to the living room, grab a tazer, walk back to naruto and hit him with it.
> 
> Yeah I'm sure he's just gonna wait while you do so.



I spend all my free time IN the living room watching TV. I don't have to walk past him at all, I'm already there.



> Earth to OBD, chapter 1 naruto can jump in your face before you even realize what's going on.



If he didn't waste time stopping and yelling a death threat, sure, I'd agree with you.

As it is he makes two criminal mistakes:

1) he attacks me in a place where he can't dodge worth shit.

2) he stops to yell threats at me, whereas my first instinct will be charge the stupid kid and beat the shit out of him for all the idiocy he did in the manga so far.

Neither of them are good things to do for someone who fancies himself a ninja, and neither is healthy when the guy you are after wants to maim you just as badly and doesn't waste time yelling back.

Just saying...


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## Zaru (Feb 16, 2010)

Jesus christ dude you want to beat up a fictional 12 year old kid that grew up without parents and hated by everyone in his surrounding


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## Nimademe (Feb 16, 2010)

Lucifeller said:


> As I said, so long as I get to mutilate him beforehand, I don't mind dying. That part about me wanting to inflict bodily harm on him seems to go right over people's heads.
> 
> Hell, I'm less hostile today to him than I was a couple months ago. Back then, I'd have answered to a topic like this with 'I kick him in the balls while he's saying he'll rip me apart and then curbstomp his teeth off with extreme prejudice', because I'm not a freaking manga character, and I'm not letting someone who makes me see RED HATE HAZE run his mouth right in front of me, I'm going to charge first and get violent, and to hell with those claiming a crotch shot at an opponent doing his speech is unfair.
> 
> ...



Wouldn't a simple kunai throw end you?


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## Lucifeller (Feb 16, 2010)

Nimademe said:


> Wouldn't a simple kunai throw end you?



In a 4x4 room with him practically at arm's length from me? While he pauses to rant about killing me?

He should have thrown first and talked shit later. I may not be fast, but at that range, even if he does get a kunai out, I'll already have introduced his crotch to Mr. Foot.



> Jesus christ dude you want to beat up a fictional 12 year old kid that grew up without parents and hated by everyone in his surrounding



No, I want to beat up an annoying 12 year old twerp who plays stupid pranks, yells obnoxiously all the time, grows up into one of the most dim-witted main characters ever what with his obsession over someone who TRIED TO KILL HIM BY PUNCHING A HOLE IN HIS CHEST, and just BROKE INTO MY HOUSE YELLING HE WILL KILL ME.

That is enough reason for me to want to curbstomp him. The fact his character grew into one of my most hated mains ever doesn't help. Too bad, the series wasn't bad per se...


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## death1217 (Feb 16, 2010)

Zaru said:


> Jesus christ dude you want to beat up a fictional 12 year old kid that grew up without parents and hated by everyone in his surrounding



he is not just hated by everyone in his surrounding he is hated by everyone everywhere also naruto gets pwned by my GARness


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## Zaru (Feb 16, 2010)

He doesn't pause. He enters your house and screams, alerting you of his presence.

You are not going to surprise a kid that can completely surprise experienced warriors.


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## Nimademe (Feb 16, 2010)

Highly Visible Ninja.


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## Lucifeller (Feb 16, 2010)

Zaru said:


> He doesn't pause. He enters your house and screams, alerting you of his presence.
> 
> You are not going to surprise a kid that can completely surprise experienced warriors.



Chapter 1 Naruto is a scrub. He only 'surprises' Mizuki because he thought he had run away and was completely focused on killing Iruka, and he beat him up because he was hopped up on Kyuubi chakra.

Before that, early Naruto's ONLY known feats were to be the worst student in the class both in theory and practice, to KO the Hokage (who had snuck up on HIM; not the opposite) with a perverted jutsu used on a pinch, and to show lack of common sense by thinking a shady-sounding trial would include robbing the leader of your village.

Oh, and failing to make a functioning Bunshin. To the point Iruka was unamused. And painting the monument in broadf daylight, with everyone seeing him and him getting caught and tied up like a salami by Iruka in short order without even the dignity of a chase scene.


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## Zaru (Feb 16, 2010)

He said chapter 1 naruto minus kage bunshin so that includes the late showings.

No matter how you put it, he still kicked an adult away into the opposite direction he was moving before, several meters even. The speed/force necessary to do that surpass you and everyone in this thread until someone shows me a video of himself kicking an adult away several meters by a kick to the face


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## Nimademe (Feb 16, 2010)

Lucifeller said:


> Chapter 1 Naruto is a scrub. He only 'surprises' Mizuki because he thought he had run away and was completely focused on killing Iruka, and he beat him up because he was hopped up on Kyuubi chakra.
> 
> Before that, early Naruto's ONLY known feats were to be the worst student in the class both in theory and practice, to KO the Hokage (who had snuck up on HIM; not the opposite) with a perverted jutsu used on a pinch, and to show lack of common sense by thinking a shady-sounding trial would include robbing the leader of your village.
> 
> Oh, and failing to make a functioning Bunshin. To the point Iruka was unamused. And painting the monument in broadf daylight, with everyone seeing him and him getting caught and tied up like a salami by Iruka in short order without even the dignity of a chase scene.



And can you match anything Naruto has? He beats you in all parameters, aside from meta knowledge.


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## Lucifeller (Feb 16, 2010)

Until otherwise proven, I beat him in knowing how to break bones and disable joints. I did learn something from all that grappling, including a few dozen ways to make important body parts stop moving. Also, Chapter 1 Naruto pretty much shows no finesse at all, and you don't need enormous strength to dislocate someone's shoulder and tear the ligaments apart. Especially since you can use the opponent's own strength against them.

That goes extra true if you really don't care about getting hurt yourself.

I'm also pretty sure I have him beat in pure intent to cause grievous harm to a body. :ho


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## Zaru (Feb 16, 2010)

If you beat him up badly kyuubi comes out.


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## Lucifeller (Feb 16, 2010)

And I don't care. So long as I made a mess of him to the point he remembers me, I'll have made my point.

What I'd want isn't survive, it's have him look back and say 'holy shit that sucked, should've left that guy alone'. If I have to gnaw his face's flesh off with my teeth to get that reaction, so be it.


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## Zaru (Feb 16, 2010)

He was impaled by Sasuke and doesn't look back thinking "holy shit that sucked", so good luck


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## Lucifeller (Feb 16, 2010)

Zaru said:


> He was impaled by Sasuke and doesn't look back thinking "holy shit that sucked", so good luck



That's because he wants Sasuke's manbabies and is willing to forgive and forget that one. :ho


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## Pervy Fox (Feb 16, 2010)

Naruto may have been weak in Chapter 1, but he's was no ameteur, he still had incredible ninja skills and probably trained everyday before chapter 1, so your baseball bats or cramped hallway is'nt gonna cut it, he can appear anywear.

LOL A chainsaw??? Holy shit man lol


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## Zaru (Feb 16, 2010)

Hatred makes blind.

You, sir, are the OBD version of Sasuke. Mangekyou chainsaw or not.


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## death1217 (Feb 16, 2010)

Pervy Fox said:


> Naruto may have been weak in Chapter 1, but he's was no ameteur, he still had incredible ninja skills and probably trained everyday before chapter 1, so your baseball bats or cramped hallway is'nt gonna cut it, he can appear anywear.
> 
> LOL A chainsaw??? Holy shit man lol



yea thats why he always passed all of his exams and never flunked right....oh wait


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## Sephiroth (Feb 16, 2010)

I pull out my pistol, I shoot him, he dies.


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## Pervy Fox (Feb 16, 2010)

death1217 said:


> yea thats why he always passed all of his exams and never flunked right....oh wait



He can still take on a normal human being.


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## Zaru (Feb 16, 2010)

- How paranoid are you that you always carry a loaded pistol with you
- What stops naruto from regenerating from the wound ("olol I'm gonna hit his head, I'm a trained sharpshooter")


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## death1217 (Feb 16, 2010)

Pervy Fox said:


> He can still take on a normal human being.



he isn't dodging a bullet  
besides just mentioning sasuke or showing him naked sakura picx should knock him out


Zaru said:


> - How paranoid are you that you always carry a loaded pistol with you
> - What stops naruto from regenerating from the wound ("olol I'm gonna hit his head, I'm a trained sharpshooter")



naruto didn't regenerate in first chapter


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## Sephiroth (Feb 16, 2010)

Zaru said:


> - How paranoid are you that you always carry a loaded pistol with you
> - What stops naruto from regenerating from the wound ("olol I'm gonna hit his head, I'm a trained sharpshooter")



A couple shots to the chest are fine, then shoot him in the head when he falls on the ground.

Who wouldn't pull out their gun if someone is breaking into their house?


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## Nimademe (Feb 16, 2010)

I love how people overestimate themselves to peak-high human conditions.


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## Lucifeller (Feb 16, 2010)

Pervy Fox said:


> Naruto may have been weak in Chapter 1, but he's was no ameteur, he still had incredible ninja skills and probably trained everyday before chapter 1, so your baseball bats or cramped hallway is'nt gonna cut it, he can appear anywear.
> 
> LOL A chainsaw??? Holy shit man lol



He can appear through walls now? News to me. Scan of where exactly in chapter 1 he shows his ability to PHASE THROUGH FUCKING WALLS to avoid a guy who takes up half the room they are in charging at him to beat his face into a mess.

And my house has tiny rooms all over - no matter what direction he comes in at, he WILL be within arm's length of me or at most one step away. Attacking me in my house when your best advantage is maneuverability is a mistake only a rank amateur would make, since there's no room for speed or acrobatics, and if he's stupid enough to do it, he's asking for a brutalizing.

As for the chainsaw? I used it to cut down a few dead trees a few years back. I liked it though, so I kept it - feels like something out of Evil Dead. :ho



> Hatred makes blind.
> 
> You, sir, are the OBD version of Sasuke. Mangekyou chainsaw or not.



I find your lack of faith disturbing. *labored breathing*


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## Zaru (Feb 16, 2010)

You're several cubic meters big? 

Is your house some kind of underground catacomb or what


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## Nimademe (Feb 16, 2010)

Lucifeller said:


> He can appear through walls now? News to me. Scan of where exactly in chapter 1 he shows his ability to PHASE THROUGH FUCKING WALLS to avoid a guy who takes up half the room they are in charging at him to beat his face into a mess.
> 
> And my house has tiny rooms all over - no matter what direction he comes in at, he WILL be within arm's length of me or at most one step away. Attacking me in my house when your best advantage is maneuverability is a mistake only a rank amateur would make, since there's no room for speed or acrobatics, and if he's stupid enough to do it, he's asking for a brutalizing.
> 
> ...



If he is in arms length of you, can't you say the same for him?


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## Michellism (Feb 16, 2010)

I love how OBDers go around shooting random blonde japanese kids 

Naruto Burst in 

OBDer shoots

OBDer goes to jail for murder 

Anal rape till OBDer hyperventilates

Naruto wins in the long run


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## Zaru (Feb 16, 2010)

Seriously.

I'm sure you're all gonna be level-headed, calm and thinking straight when A FICTIONAL CHARACTER pops up in your house.


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## Sephiroth (Feb 16, 2010)

Blonde teenager breaking and entering your house with weapons in hand, yeah your allowed under law to fire.



> screams he will tear you apart and prove his strengh


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## Zaru (Feb 16, 2010)

Yeah defending yourself against someone isn't exactly murder

And the police will be busy wondering why the FUCK a fictional character is lying around


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## Michellism (Feb 16, 2010)

Sephiroth said:


> Blonde teenager breaking and entering your house with weapons in hand, yeah your allowed under law to fire.



I doubt most adults know nor care who Naruto Is, They'll think it was just some kid who got a hold of a shuriken and youll be portrayed as an Adult who either

A. Used Excessive force/Killed a Kid

B. Or possible hate crime due to japanese heritage/Killed a kid

Dunno where your from but here in America people who kill kids are quickly demonized to the public, Meaning biased trial/Anal rape in Jail 

GG OBD


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## Sephiroth (Feb 16, 2010)

Yeah.................no, American forensics are a little better then that.


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## Zaru (Feb 16, 2010)

Does anyone here live in a backwards muslim country? They'd burn him on a stake for summoning otherworldly demons.


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## Michellism (Feb 16, 2010)

Sephiroth said:


> Yeah.................no, American forensics are a little better then that.



Riddle me this, Do you go around shooting every kid who shouts some dumbass nonsense? Because like it or not most people don't read Manga, Meaning they'll think naruto was just one of them dumbass kids. And if you honestly believe their isnt an inate biased instinct whenever a kid gets murder I dunno what to say to you.

*EDIT:*



Zaru said:


> Does anyone here live in a backwards muslim country? They'd burn him on a stake for summoning otherworldly demons.



Chapter 1 Naruto has no summons, Though he has the strength to kick back a full grown man.

But I guess to the casual OBDer who are obviously hypersonic reality warping city busters this isnt an impressive feat


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## Zaru (Feb 16, 2010)

Wait, am I wrong in thinking Naruto will look like his anime self and thus be completely out of place?


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## Sephiroth (Feb 16, 2010)

Michellism said:


> Riddle me this, Do you go around shooting every kid who shouts some dumbass nonsense? Because like it or not most people don't read Manga, Meaning they'll think naruto was just one of them dumbass kids. And if you honestly believe their isnt an inate biased instinct whenever a kid gets murder I dunno what to say to you.



Does every kid break into my house and threaten to kill me? The evidence would be pretty apparent.

Teenager with weapon breaks into house through window with weapons, threatens to kill me, I shot him with a registered gun, he tries to get back up and attack me, I fire a second shot into his head, all of this matches up with what the police investigate, I don't have a record, and I have never made contact with him. Police mark him as a John Doe, case closed.

Not that any of the aftermath matter in this match up, I shoot him, he dies.

End of story.


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## masamune1 (Feb 16, 2010)

If I kill him then he'd probably go Kyuubi, so I'm screwed either way. Not that he probably won't kick my ass regardless.


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## Lucifeller (Feb 16, 2010)

Zaru said:


> You're several cubic meters big?
> 
> Is your house some kind of underground catacomb or what



Most of my rooms are 4x4 and have furniture that you'll bump into even if it's small. The roof is 2.40 meters tall. I'm 1.98 meters tall and a good 60 centimeters large around the shoulders (out of shape all you want, still former grappler, so all I really lost is speed).

You work your way around me in such a cramped space. Careful not to bump into the furniture in the room, kekeke.

But yeah, tiny house is fucking tiny. Can't wait until I get a better job so I can move to a larger one.



> If he is in arms length of you, can't you say the same for him?



I'm nearly two meters tall and he's short even for a twelve years old, stated more than once in the manga. My arms are longer than his, by a good margin. Comes with being way past my teens, y'know?



> Seriously.
> 
> I'm sure you're all gonna be level-headed, calm and thinking straight when A FICTIONAL CHARACTER pops up in your house.



I'm going to be seeing red. And when I do that I tend to be less than reasonable and more inclined to smash first and ask questions later. I already can't stand brats who run around dressed like him, you think I'm going to do anything OTHER than beat the shit out of a punk who breaks into my HOUSE dressed like a despised character, yelling death threats?

No, what I'd do is kick him in the teeth first and start thinking later, if at all.



> Riddle me this, Do you go around shooting every kid who shouts some dumbass nonsense?



No, but I'd definitely beat the shit out of a kid who barged into my house without permission while armed and shouting threats. Especially since he'd have had to break the door or window to enter, and at that point it's breaking and entering,a nd even the law states that someone is entitled to use force to defend himself. Add to this said kid is armed and was threatening you of death, and no jury would convict you for it, at least here in Italy. Fine you through your nose until your wallet bleeds, yes. Convict, no.

Seriously, when kids in the US can walk into a school and shoot it up, I'm pretty sure juries are going to be lenient at anyone who kills a kid who was armed and threatening you after barging illegally in a house. Just mention the Columbine massacre and watch the judge conclude (biasedly) that the kid had gone insane and would have killed you if you hadn't shot first. That he obviously broke in illegally doesn't help his position any.


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## lambda (Feb 16, 2010)

Rider Kick.


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## hammer (Feb 16, 2010)

Michellism said:


> Riddle me this, Do you go around shooting every kid who shouts some dumbass nonsense? Because like it or not most people don't read Manga, Meaning they'll think naruto was just one of them dumbass kids. And if you honestly believe their isnt an inate biased instinct whenever a kid gets murder I dunno what to say to you.
> 
> *EDIT:*



Texas nuff said


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## Kathutet (Feb 16, 2010)

in all seriousness, if you don't have trained reflexes and skill that could rival one with actual combat experience, then you'll only delay the inevitable by trying to reach out for a gun. regardless of what your intentions, the size of your room, your mindset and your tools are, if you're untrained and ignorant you'll be the one that dies.

lol at people actually believing that they have what it takes to kill a ninja with highly trained senses, accuracy and flexibility.

mind you, moronic/fail kid or not, he has tools.

shuriken: throw → don't fool yourself, you can't dodge.
smoke bomb → you will become confused, being in an environment that you know helps but not a lot since he'll likely do a follow-up with a fist/tool.
kunai → i hope you all like holes because you'll have a lot of them.
light bomb → enjoy your temporary blindness as he slits your throat and humps the hole.

and let's keep in mind that his most important chapter one jutsu > you.

sexy no jutsu.

when you see a cute naked blonde chick in your house you'll change the gun for your "pistol".

my god harem no jutsu.

friend why ain't you at my house yet


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## Lucifeller (Feb 16, 2010)

...I hate blondes, and on top of that I find Naruto's female persona ugly. Not stopping me, especially since I know it's him. Still getting his face beat in, only EXTRA hard for thinking I'd stop and consider going gaga over a MALE.

Also, just for the record. Naruto only ever shows one weapon - kunai. The smoke that appears sometimes is from him either creating or dispelling Kage Bunshin, and isn't thick enough, and he hasn't used flashbangs or shuriken at all. I'm NOT going to assume he has weapons we haven't ever fucking seen him use. Going by that logic, someone will end up giving him a chakra sword by chapter 1.



> regardless of what your intentions, the size of your room, your mindset and your tools are, if you're untrained and ignorant you'll be the one that dies.



Good thing I'm not untrained and ignorant. I know enough ways to break bones and cripple limbs that I can comfortably say I have a precise idea of what I'm doing.

In a cramped space like my home, and under the OP's conditions, the advantage right at the start is mine, not his, because he'll be too close for his comfort, not close enough to be able to put his own equipment to use before I've rammed him into the wall, and unable to dodge worth a damn. And all I really need is landing my mitts on him ONE time to make sure wherever I land them on will stop moving in short order.

If this were a more open space, I wouldn't have a chance in hell, because he'd outmaneuver me. But in the situation the OP stipulated, it's a different story.

One last thing.



> lol at people actually believing that they have what it takes to kill a ninja with highly trained senses, accuracy and flexibility.



BOTTOM OF HIS CLASS AT EVERYTHING. EVEN PRACTICE. And if you are going to tell me Chouji is flexible and accurate (remember, he was the 'average' member of InoShikaCho), I'm going to point at you and laugh, because for all that I like Chouji, he has shown all the agility of an elephant - although admittedly with raw power to match.

Highly trained, my ass. Just saying, because people seem to forget how much Naruto FAILED at things early on. Don't confuse current Naruto with the loser he used to be back then, when he was frozen on the spot when the Demon Brothers attacked for so long even TAZUNA reacted faster than he did, and he had trouble catching a bloody CAT.


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## Kathutet (Feb 16, 2010)

Lucifeller said:


> ...I hate blondes, and on top of that I find Naruto's female persona ugly. Not stopping me, especially since I know it's him. Still getting his face beat in, only EXTRA hard for thinking I'd stop and consider going gaga over a MALE.


... i've seen people taking half-serious replies to cirus mode but this is ridiculous.



> Also, just for the record. Naruto only ever shows one weapon - kunai. The smoke that appears sometimes is from him either creating or dispelling Kage Bunshin, and isn't thick enough, and he hasn't used flashbangs or shuriken at all. I'm NOT going to assume he has weapons we haven't ever fucking seen him use. Going by that logic, someone will end up giving him a chakra sword by chapter 1.


the OP said tools and didn't specify which ones. so i'm assuming he has those.



> Good thing I'm not untrained and ignorant. I know enough ways to break bones and cripple limbs that I can comfortably say I have a precise idea of what I'm doing.


that's nice. i'm curious, did you practice martial arts?



> In a cramped space like my home, and under the OP's conditions, the advantage right at the start is mine, not his, *because he'll be too close* for his comfort, not close enough to be able to put his own equipment to use before I've rammed him into the wall, and unable to dodge worth a damn. And all I really need is landing my mitts on him ONE time to make sure wherever I land them on will stop moving in short order.


what if the first punch is his? ever thought about that or does the element of surprise not work on you? are you... a superhuman being?



> If this were a more open space, I wouldn't have a chance in hell, because he'd outmaneuver me. But in the situation the OP stipulated, it's a different story.


not really.



> BOTTOM OF *HIS CLASS* AT EVERYTHING. EVEN PRACTICE. And if you are going to tell me Chouji is flexible and accurate (remember, he was the 'average' member of InoShikaCho), I'm going to point at you and laugh, because for all that I like Chouji, he has shown all the agility of an elephant - although admittedly with raw power to match.


you're too busy telling yourself you'd win to notice that you're forgetting one very basic thing. look at what i put in bold there.

his class.

you're not even close of his class' abilities nor is anyone on this entire forum.

did i say every ninja? i believe i referred to naruto when i said ninja. point at me and laugh while i shit myself laughing when you misinterpret something once more.



> Highly trained, my ass. Just saying, because people seem to forget how much Naruto FAILED at things early on. Don't confuse current Naruto with the loser he used to be back then, when he was frozen on the spot when the Demon Brothers attacked for so long even TAZUNA reacted faster than he did, and he had trouble catching a bloody CAT.


yes he failed. but i don't get why you'd use the demon brothers argument when that is completely irrelevant. he is the one that attacks here. he starts the fight. he isn't being attacked, he didn't get surprised and he's aggressive. au contraire, he's the one that's attacking and surprising. mind you, the OP states that he enter your house with the intention to tear you apart (...).

can you catch a cat in a forest?

also i've noticed that one scenario of mine is faulty; the smoke bomb one. naruto would be too much of an idiot to use them for a combo (ch 1).


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## Kurou (Feb 16, 2010)

Kenneth said:


> in all seriousness, if you don't have trained reflexes and skill that could rival one with actual combat experience, then you'll only delay the inevitable by trying to reach out for a gun. regardless of what your intentions, the size of your room, your mindset and your tools are, if you're untrained and ignorant you'll be the one that dies.
> 
> *lol at people actually believing that they have what it takes to kill a ninja with highly trained senses, accuracy and flexibility.*



lol. naruto was the laughing stock if his entire village because in terms of skill he completely sucked.



> mind you, moronic/fail kid or not, he has tools.
> 
> shuriken: throw → don't fool yourself, you can't dodge.
> smoke bomb → you will become confused, being in an environment that you know helps but not a lot since he'll likely do a follow-up with a fist/tool.
> ...



which naruto has no idea how to actually use because he's an idiot. not to mention the whole shouting as soon as he break into your house,which wouldn't even matter because if he did break into your house you'd hear it. naruto is exactly known for his "stealth"



> and let's keep in mind that his most important chapter one jutsu > you.
> 
> sexy no jutsu.
> 
> ...



oh yeah because some blonde haired,orange jump suit wearing,no hairline havin ass ninja turning into a chick _really_ turns me on :rollseyes.


you may be into that shit.


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## Lucifeller (Feb 16, 2010)

> that's nice. i'm curious, did you practice martial arts?



Not sure if you count it as martial art, but I did practice Vale Tudo, greco-roman for a bit (mostly to get the strangleholds down pat) and a bit of kickboxing, though the latter I didn't like much. It was mostly for fun, but I learned several ways to dislocate limbs or outright break them, and yes, I did get hurt over it, badly even.

So yes, I do have formal training. Just not in martial arts as defined by hong kong movies. Get the Bruce Lee shit out of your head, I simply know how to make body parts stop moving the hard way, and don't much care about all that fairness and honorable fighting hogwash. If it helps you win, anything goes - that's the whole point of Vale Tudo in its purest form.



> what if the first punch is his? ever thought about that or does the element of surprise not work on you? are you... a superhuman being?



No. I simply READ the OP. It specifies his first actions are breaking in and shouting a death threat. MY first action if someone breaks in and is armed, kid or not, is not to threaten them, but to cave their face in with whichever means available.



> you're too busy telling yourself you'd win to notice that you're forgetting one very basic thing. look at what i put in bold there.
> 
> his class.
> 
> ...



Wow, Naruto sure is a ninja. He uses stealth, cunning and sneak attacks while unseen...

...

...

...

Oh wait. He DRESSES IN BRIGHT ORANGE, uses zergrush as his favorite tactic, and even when he has a kunai, he never ever throws it, instead closing in for melee.

Highly Visible Ninja aren't ninja, they are glorified H2H fighters. When he starts acting and dressing sensibly, call me back. As it is now, he lacks the tactics to capitalize on what should be superior physical prowess.



> yes he failed. but i don't get why you'd use the demon brothers argument when that is completely irrelevant. he is the one that attacks here. he starts the fight. he isn't being attacked, he didn't get surprised and he's aggressive. au contraire, he's the one that's attacking and surprising. mind you, the OP states that he enter your house with the intention to tear you apart (...).
> 
> can you catch a cat in a forest?



I'm using the Demon brothers example to show that early Naruto doesn't take aggression very well, especially when he doesn't expect it. Case in point, he was so stunned by the ferocity of the attack that even Tazuna, a 50 YEARS OLD CIVILIAN WITH NO TRAINING WHATSOEVER, was faster in realizing the danger than Naruto was.

Chapter 1 Naruto is a scrub who still needs to learn about actually being a ninja as opposed to a loud moron. If this was even only past Wave Country Naruto, I'd readily admit I die. At the point of Chapter 1? He's way, way, way too inept and too much of a cretin for his poor training to matter.

That's all I'm saying. Make it anything OTHER than Ch1 Naruto, or even Ch1 Naruto with Kage Bunshin, and I'd concede. Ch1 KB-less Naruto, one on one and in a small space where I have reach advantage? It can go either way, and regardless he's not getting out of it n one piece unless he starts acting sensibly - which given he barges in my house very loudly, I'd say isn't the case.


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## Pegasus Seiya (Feb 16, 2010)

I am shooting the ^ (not the meaning of the word "respect".) with my gun, gg the blond wannabe ^ (use bro)


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## Gunners (Feb 16, 2010)

People really think they can win this? There's a difference in strength, agility and speed. Each and everyone of you would get your ass whooped.


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## Kathutet (Feb 16, 2010)

Lucifeller said:


> Not sure if you count it as martial art, but I did practice Vale Tudo, greco-roman for a bit (mostly to get the strangleholds down pat) and a bit of kickboxing, though the latter I didn't like much. It was mostly for fun, but I learned several ways to dislocate limbs or outright break them, and yes, I did get hurt over it, badly even.
> 
> So yes, I do have formal training. Just not in martial arts as defined by hong kong movies. Get the Bruce Lee shit out of your head, I simply know how to make body parts stop moving the hard way, and don't much care about all that fairness and honorable fighting hogwash. If it helps you win, anything goes - that's the whole point of Vale Tudo in its purest form.


 i see. however i didn't have bruce lee shit in my mind at all so spare me your assumptions. i simply asked out of interest.



> No. I simply READ the OP. It specifies his first actions are breaking in and shouting a death threat. MY first action if someone breaks in and is armed, kid or not, is not to threaten them, but to cave their face in with whichever means available.


you're claiming to not be surprised when someone breaks into your home shouting and raging.

do you... expect someone to break in at every moment of the day?



> Wow, Naruto sure is a ninja. He uses stealth, cunning and sneak attacks while unseen...
> 
> ...
> 
> ...


talking about fighting skill =/= talking about stealth. also i called him a ninja because almost everyone ITT does.



> Highly Visible Ninja aren't ninja, they are glorified H2H fighters. When he starts acting and dressing sensibly, call me back. As it is now, he lacks the tactics to capitalize on what should be superior physical prowess.


okay, so you're fighting a H2H fighter that has caught you by surprise.



> I'm using the Demon brothers example to show that early Naruto doesn't take aggression very well, especially when he doesn't expect it. Case in point, he was so stunned by the ferocity of the attack that even Tazuna, a 50 YEARS OLD CIVILIAN WITH NO TRAINING WHATSOEVER, was faster in realizing the danger than Naruto was.


point taken. i agree.



> Chapter 1 Naruto is a scrub who still needs to learn about actually being a ninja as opposed to a loud moron. If this was even only past Wave Country Naruto, I'd readily admit I die. At the point of Chapter 1? He's way, way, way too inept and too much of a cretin for his poor training to matter.


point taken as well.



> That's all I'm saying. Make it anything OTHER than Ch1 Naruto, or even Ch1 Naruto with Kage Bunshin, and I'd concede. Ch1 KB-less Naruto, one on one and in a small space where I have *reach advantage*? It can go either way, and regardless he's not getting out of it n one piece unless he starts acting sensibly - which given he barges in my house very loudly, I'd say isn't the case.


i forgot about this, point taken as well.

returning to base since this has no point whatsoever.


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## Lucifeller (Feb 16, 2010)

> i see. however i didn't have bruce lee shit in my mind at all so spare me your assumptions. i simply asked out of interest.



Sorry about that, it's just that most people, when asked about martial arts, seem to have Jackie Chan movies in mind. You have no idea how much that makes me want to bang my head on a wall. That's not MA, it's choreography.



> you're claiming to not be surprised when someone breaks into your home shouting and raging.
> 
> do you... expect someone to break in at every moment of the day?



Let me put it this way. Where I live, even going to the stadium for the soccer game is hazardous to your health, and leaving the car unlocked downstairs for even just three fucking minutes will get it stolen.

I wish I was kidding, but I'm not. 

So yes, I'm rather twitchy when home alone. Got burglarized thrice in the last four months and my father's car doors were totaled twice in two months by some hoodlums with nothing better to do.


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## Pegasus Seiya (Feb 16, 2010)

Gunners said:


> People really think they can win this? There's a difference in strength, agility and speed. Each and everyone of you would get your ass whooped.



i put my gun into his ass and shoot him, you don't get it do you?the homo is dead, guns>naruto


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## Gunners (Feb 16, 2010)

> I'm using the Demon brothers example to show that early Naruto doesn't take aggression very well, especially when he doesn't expect it. Case in point, he was so stunned by the ferocity of the attack that even Tazuna, a 50 YEARS OLD CIVILIAN WITH NO TRAINING WHATSOEVER, was faster in realizing the danger than Naruto was.


This also helps

I'm sure you carry the same threat as those guys right? I mean some average Joe is more intimidating than a trained killer who murdered your teacher ( to your knowledge) in front of you.


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## Lucifeller (Feb 16, 2010)

The point is that A 50 YEAR OLD MAN WHO SAW THE VERY SAME DISMEMBERMENT reacted faster than the brat. And Tazuna should've been even more frozen in fear than Naruto.

Seriously.


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## spankdatbitch (Feb 16, 2010)

Crimson King said:


> Guns>Ninja



Fair enough.

If you start with the gun in your hand you might have a chance at winning,unless naruto blitzes you anyway which is likely.Some distance between you would be nice. 

If you start without the gun in your hands you're as good as dead.Despite being 12 the kids a lot more fast and durable than just about any human in the real world.You'll be killed before you can even think about getting your gun out.

And the people here that actually think they can take Naruto in hand to hand combat are delusional.

Come on people,I know the OBD hates naruto but lets not let our ego's get the best of us.



KurouKetsu said:


> yeah because its not like he has to do the same with his kunai



Naruto's reaction time and speed >>>>>>>>>>Yours.

Also Naruto can send several shuriken speeding in your direction before you can even pull the trigger once. 



KurouKetsu said:


> i mean really its not like he has to take it out of the pouch and come charging at me in a straight line



I think you're forgetting that Naruto isn't some training dummy set on a straight track.

He can so these little bothersome things like jumping and zig zagging to avoid your slow aim.




KurouKetsu said:


> OH WAIT-



Which is probably all you'll have time to say before Naruto evades your fire,and implants half a dozen shuriken in your cranium.


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## Shoddragon (Feb 16, 2010)

Kenneth said:


> in all seriousness, if you don't have trained reflexes and skill that could rival one with actual combat experience, then you'll only delay the inevitable by trying to reach out for a gun. regardless of what your intentions, the size of your room, your mindset and your tools are, if you're untrained and ignorant you'll be the one that dies.
> 
> *1.* *WTf lol. stop posting. as shown, you have no idea what our rooms are like, and you are massively wanking naruto, literally, between the wall and my bed is 1 and a half feet. just around HALF a meter. good luck dodging gunshots.*
> 
> ...



responses in bold and seriously: stop wanking naruto and weapons. good lord.


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## Genyosai (Feb 16, 2010)

I don't kill kids, even ^ (not the meaning of the word "respect".) like Naruto. I just say "You're a ^ (not the meaning of the word "respect".)." and then let him kill me... but he'll have to live with how much he fails for the rest of his life, and my words will slowly eat away at his soul.


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## Pegasus Seiya (Feb 16, 2010)

Genyosai said:


> I don't kill kids, even ^ (not the meaning of the word "respect".) like Naruto. I just say "You're a ^ (not the meaning of the word "respect".)." and then let him kill me... but he'll have to live with how much he fails for the rest of his life, and my words will slowly eat away at his soul.



i think if you will tell him sasuke, he will hyperventilate and he will die from fagness


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## Kathutet (Feb 16, 2010)

edit: meh shoddragon, ignored. i didn't ask for you to be an ass.
be more like this guy who isn't acting like a complete prick.


Lucifeller said:


> Sorry about that, it's just that most people,  when asked about martial arts, seem to have Jackie Chan movies in mind.  You have no idea how much that makes me want to bang my head on a wall.  That's not MA, it's choreography.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


i know. used to do some karate (judging from what i read here, it's pretty inferior to what you practiced D: ) and when i mentioned it people started saying they could do karate too, followed by a series of awkward movements that would make rain man feel uncomfortable. 

also i see why you say why it wouldn't surprise you. i guess that living in those circumstances for some time really puts you on edge.

admitting defeat. :>


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## Shoddragon (Feb 16, 2010)

Kenneth said:


> edit: meh shoddragon, ignored. i didn't ask for you to be an ass.
> be more like this guy who isn't acting like a complete prick.
> 
> i know. used to do some karate (judging from what i read here, it's pretty inferior to what you practiced D: ) and when i mentioned it people started saying they could do karate too, followed by a series of awkward movements that would make rain man feel uncomfortable.
> ...



your wanking chapter 1 naruto to massive bounds. not my fault you think I'm being an ass.


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## Lucifeller (Feb 16, 2010)

Kenneth said:


> edit: meh shoddragon, ignored. i didn't ask for you to be an ass.
> be more like this guy who isn't acting like a complete prick.
> 
> i know. used to do some karate (judging from what i read here, it's pretty inferior to what you practiced D: ) and when i mentioned it people started saying they could do karate too, followed by a series of awkward movements that would make rain man feel uncomfortable.
> ...



Let me give you an idea of how the place can be. About three-four years ago, a group of clowns SNUCK A MOTORCYCLE PAST STADIUM SECURITY (don't ask how, must've taken either lots of bribing or actual ninja skills), and threw it off the tribune seat sector.

On the people under them.

Miraculously, no one was hurt badly, but since then, I can't enjoy the stadium anymore. Always afraid someone will drop some heavy, large shit on me.

Any soccer fan can confirm to you that european soccer games can become war zones at times. It's freaky.


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## Kurou (Feb 16, 2010)

spankdatbitch said:


> Fair enough.
> 
> If you start with the gun in your hand you might have a chance at winning,unless naruto blitzes you anyway which is likely.Some distance between you would be nice.
> 
> ...




su~ure      .


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## Shoddragon (Feb 16, 2010)

except him "blitzing" the guy who was gonna kill iruka ( mizaki or something shit, mizuki?) was naruto running at full speed catching him totally off guard in an open field. the only thing peak human about naruto was maybe his running speed. his reflexes were nothing peak human. he isn't blitzign me before I get the damn gun.

everyone saying naruto wins keeps forgetting that each house is different, and that most people here know where my room is. saying ANOTHER person loses is retarded because you have no idea their about strength and weapons. also: me immediately putting a knife in naruto's neck = he is dead you know.


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## spankdatbitch (Feb 16, 2010)

Shoddragon said:


> His reflexes were nothing peak human. he isn't blitzign me before I get the damn gun.




How can you seriously make that judgment?

So you think his running is at or above peak human,but somehow his overall speed and reflexes wouldn't be?How does that make any sense,and how can you even make that assumption?

Kid or not Naruto's been trained for several years in the use of Ninja weapons and tactics.And he literally spent all his time he wasn't at ninja school, training his body for combat.

So unless you know a shitload about several kinds of fighting tactics and train your body several hours everyday,I don't see how anyone in the OBD would even stand a chance.



Shoddragon said:


> also: me immediately putting a knife in naruto's neck = he is dead you know.



Ok a gun I could somewhat understand.

But are you actually suggesting you could take him on close combat in a fight with knives?

No...just No 

If you use a firearm you might get in a lucky shot or somehow trick Naruto into your line of fire.But if you try to take him head on with knives or fists you're going to die,plain and simple.




KurouKetsu said:


> su~ure      .



Yep..U Die


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## Shoddragon (Feb 16, 2010)

spankdatbitch said:


> How can you seriously make that judgment?
> 
> So you think his running is at or above peak human,but somehow his overall speed and reflexes wouldn't be?How does that make any sense,and how can you even make that assumption?
> 
> ...




because speed and reflexes don't exactly have a correlation? I can't move as fast as my friend who is nearly a blackbelt in karate but my reflexes shit all over his.

I know from experience. naruto's max running speed in chapter 1 surely owns mine, but again, your missing the fact ITS IN AN OPEN FIELD. my room is narrow. also, am I the only 1 who read the OP? naruto is going to scream that he's going to tear me apart. that gives me enough time to get the knife which is literally about 7 inches from my hand right NOW and stab him in the next with it. and regardless of naruto's "power", he isn't just shrugging that off.

your also forgetting that all those years training to become a ninja were spent FAILING to become a ninja. naruto isn't the one who constantly trained like crazy, that was rock lee.

feats from chapter 1 disprove all those years of training. I am not suggesting I am talking him on in a fight with knives. I am suggesting I can take the knife next to me and jam it/slice open his neck when he is literally only a few feet ( about 1 and a half) behind me.

does naruto even start inside my actual house, is he outside the house, inside? because right inside my first door is stairs leading up to where I live and straight ahead is my aunts place, and the basement is my uncle's place. if I hear someone screaming some shit, i think I have more than enough time to get my gun and go blow his ass away.


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## Antitard (Feb 16, 2010)

Yea I'm sure most people here in OBD have guns at home


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## paulatreides0 (Feb 16, 2010)

I have Missiles! I win!


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## Pervy Fox (Feb 16, 2010)

paulatreides0 said:


> I have Missiles! I win!



Plastic doesnt count


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## paulatreides0 (Feb 16, 2010)

Pervy Fox said:


> Plastic doesnt count


Damn! Time to bring out the C4 then!


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## Bozu89 (Feb 16, 2010)

The moment he enters my house, I give him a glass of milk and tell him: "Don't worry it's not expired". Then I would tell him of the future that awaits him and he would slowly die by hyperventlating and by the "milk" that I gave a few moments ago which is actually horse semen, Naruto being the idiot that he is wouldn't no the difference between milk and horse semen. Then I would freeze him so that future generations can witness this ugly piece of work.


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## hammer (Feb 16, 2010)

you own horse semen?


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## Zaru (Feb 16, 2010)

Obviously, drinking milk offered by a guy that you want to kill  sounds like a great idea


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## Shoddragon (Feb 16, 2010)

Zaru said:


> Obviously, drinking milk offered by a guy that you want to kill  sounds like a great idea



so does listening to a guy who tells you to go steal a forbidden scroll . o wait...


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## Gunners (Feb 16, 2010)

> so does listening to a guy who tells you to go steal a forbidden scroll . o wait...


It's an issue of trust not intelligence. Mizuki was his teacher, people trust tend to trust their teacher more than someone who they've told ''I'm going to kill you'' to.


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