# ufc vs 20 gorillas



## puolakanaho (Sep 23, 2015)

every ufc league fighters vs 20 gorillas

bloodlusted

fight takes place in football ring.


if gorillas stomp then jackie chan joins the ufc fighters.


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## hammer (Sep 23, 2015)

is jackie looking for trouble?

Reactions: Funny 1


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## puolakanaho (Sep 23, 2015)

hammer said:


> is jackie looking for trouble?



he is not looking for trable.

Reactions: Funny 1


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## AgentAAA (Sep 23, 2015)

gorillas stomp in seconds except for if jackie is looking for trable.

Reactions: Funny 1


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## xmysticgohanx (Sep 23, 2015)

How many fighters are in the UFC again?


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## AgentAAA (Sep 23, 2015)

xmysticgohanx said:


> How many fighters are in the UFC again?



566.
In other words: not enough.


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## Linkofone (Sep 23, 2015)

Why would Jackie fight for the UFC? He'd rather fight with the gorillas.

Reactions: Funny 1


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## puolakanaho (Sep 23, 2015)

Linkofone said:


> Why would Jackie fight for the UFC? He'd rather fight with the gorillas.



fine.


how about we change the bonus round to brock lesnar without his limiters entering the ufc side?


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## Tonathan100 (Sep 23, 2015)

566 UFC combatants can easily take on 20 gorrilas, if nothing else due to sheer force of numbers.


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## Mr. Black Leg (Sep 23, 2015)

I'd say if it was 566 men with physical peak vs 20 gorillas they could somehow outsmart them . But UFC has a lower intelect than gorillas, I mean, look at Brock Lesnar . 

Now, no kidding, are you sure that 28 men, that are very fit, aren't able to take out 1 gorilla ?


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## Totally not a cat (Sep 23, 2015)

Well, 28 men can't all simultaneously attack a gorilla and they're getting one shotted in return. Think of those scenes with swarms of ninjas attacking the protagonist's party and how good that works out.


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## puolakanaho (Sep 23, 2015)

Totally not a cat said:


> Well, 28 men can't all simultaneously attack a gorilla and they're getting one shotted in return. Think of those scenes with swarms of ninjas attacking the protagonist's party and how good that works out.



didnt know conservation no jutsu is considered valid here?


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## Yami Munesanzun (Sep 23, 2015)

Gorillas: Physically above peak humans, and have a notably higher pain tolerance.

Not to mention...

you know...

FANGS. 

You know, those large-ass sharp teeth that actually have a function. 

It's Planet of the Apes all over again.


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## xmysticgohanx (Sep 23, 2015)

I don't think the ufc fighters will be able to hurt them that much honestly


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## Totally not a cat (Sep 23, 2015)

The only way I see the fighters actually making some damage is if they were to use the bones and limbs of their dismembered team mates as weapons. Same goes for the gorillas, though, they're known sharping sticks and using them as weapons as well as hurling boulders at would-be predators.

After the gorillas pick up a dead body and start swinging it at the other fighters it all goes down even faster.


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## Gunstarvillain (Sep 24, 2015)

Gorillaz stomp. Chimpanzees are already known to be base stronger than humans. Doesn't matter how you cut it. They are about that life.


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## Yami Munesanzun (Sep 24, 2015)

And, you know.

A bunch of muscly, sweaty guys hooting, hollering and making grand physical gestures won't sit too well with a gorilla's temperament.


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## Kurou (Sep 24, 2015)

Tonathan100 said:


> 566 UFC combatants can easily take on 20 gorrilas, if nothing else due to sheer force of numbers.



Lol no

The difference in physical ability is to much

To a fully grown gorilla a human might as well be wet tissue

Reactions: Agree 1


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## Kurou (Sep 24, 2015)

Thinking about it now though

After killing the first few hundred the gorillas might get tired


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## Nighty the Mighty (Sep 24, 2015)

the UFC is 20 gorillas

Reactions: Funny 1


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## Hyperion1O1 (Sep 24, 2015)

A single swing from a gorilla's arm would break their bones.

Bloodlusted gorillas would tear through UFC fighters.


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## AgentAAA (Sep 24, 2015)

28 punches per gorilla
these guys are used to swinging on trees with their time and shit, they have the endurance for this.
They're good.


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## Hyperion1O1 (Sep 24, 2015)

Slightly offtopic, how do we rate Disney Kerchak's strength for a gorilla?

Slightly weaker since he got restrained by Tarzan? Or is Tarzan that strong? (Tarzan got restrained by Clayton's men though)


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## hammer (Sep 24, 2015)

Hyperion1O1 said:


> Slightly offtopic, how do we rate Disney Kerchak's strength for a gorilla?
> 
> Slightly weaker since he got restrained by Tarzan? Or is Tarzan that strong? (Tarzan got restrained by Clayton's men though)



claytons men= gorilla level


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## AgentAAA (Sep 24, 2015)

Hyperion1O1 said:


> Slightly offtopic, how do we rate Disney Kerchak's strength for a gorilla?
> 
> Slightly weaker since he got restrained by Tarzan? Or is Tarzan that strong? (Tarzan got restrained by Clayton's men though)



could be just low-end or PIS for Tarzan getting restrained.
Disney movies can be a clusterfuck though.


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## Hyperion1O1 (Sep 24, 2015)

@hammer

So Clayton's men>>>UFC fighters?


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## Mexikorn (Sep 24, 2015)

Hyperion1O1 said:


> @hammer
> 
> So Clayton's men>>>UFC fighters?



maybe he hired ufc fighters to be his men
would explain everything and make it all a lot simplerer


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## hammer (Sep 24, 2015)

Hyperion1O1 said:


> @hammer
> 
> So Clayton's men>>>UFC fighters?



most likely, but they can't hold down a gorilla like Gaston.


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## Stein (Sep 24, 2015)

Totally not a cat said:


> The only way I see the fighters actually making some damage is if they were to use the bones and limbs of their dismembered team mates as weapons. Same goes for the gorillas, though, they're known sharping sticks and using them as weapons as well as hurling boulders at would-be predators.
> 
> After the gorillas pick up a dead body and start swinging it at the other fighters it all goes down even faster.



Omg this reminds me of a discussion with my friends about how many clones of ourselves we'd need to kill one gorilla.


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## puolakanaho (Sep 24, 2015)

hammer said:


> most likely, but they can't hold down a gorilla like Gaston.



gaston would solo all the gorillas tho.


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## xmysticgohanx (Sep 24, 2015)

Stein said:


> Omg this reminds me of a discussion with my friends about how many clones of ourselves we'd need to kill one gorilla.



I can't even imagine beating up a tired Gorilla. I think their bodies would just be too hard. It'd be like pre ts Luffy vs FBH Vergo. And this is coming from a guy who was a boxer for 3 years. I guess the best my many shadow clones would be able to do is choke them


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## Linkofone (Sep 24, 2015)

Cartoons > real men. Durr.


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## TobiSan (Sep 24, 2015)

No human on planet Earth could hurt a Gorilla in a fight with bare fists. Their muscle density and bone structure is on another level. 

Gorillas can take shotgun bullets and not slow down.

This is a Silverback Gorilla cracking Security Glass in 1 jump, any human would have broken all their bones and hardly even move the glass.


That Security Glass is special made to withstand a force of a Gorilla and is 1,3cm thick.


I don't know how fast Gorillas tier out, but at least 5 Gorillas could decimate 500 UFC fighters. 1 would already run through 20 of them 20km/h. That is like a car coming at you on the road.


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## Hamaru (Sep 24, 2015)

UFC gets destroyed unless we are counting Jon Jones and Anderson Silva prime.


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## Hyperion1O1 (Sep 24, 2015)

No, they still get wrecked.

Anderson Silva just gets his leg broken again

Reactions: Agree 1


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## shade0180 (Sep 24, 2015)

> UFC gets destroyed unless we are counting Jon Jones and Anderson Silva prime.



even if hey are all in the prime of their life they are going to be wrecked


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## Yami Munesanzun (Sep 24, 2015)

Hyperion1O1 said:


> Anderson Silva just gets his leg broken again



Assuming he's lucky.


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## Hamaru (Sep 25, 2015)

There is nowhere near enough Gorillas to beat a Jon Jones/Anderson Silva prime combo. It is 1,000 years too soon.


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## AgentAAA (Sep 26, 2015)

Hamaru said:


> There is nowhere near enough Gorillas to beat a Jon Jones/Anderson Silva prime combo. It is 1,000 years too soon.



Anderson Silva gets shrekt by Anderson Silvaback


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## Mr. Black Leg (Sep 26, 2015)

AgentAAA said:


> Anderson Silva gets shrekt by Anderson Silvaback



I think I fell in love for a joke .


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## Masa (Sep 26, 2015)

Humans take heavy losses, but win by shoving their arms down the gorilla's throats and choking them to death. You guys are underestimating humans by a lot. People have killed grizzlies with their bare hands and lived. It's not the norm, but 28 to 1, grizzlies>gorillas, and very healthy humans push the odds in favor of the UFC by a good margin.


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## AgentAAA (Sep 26, 2015)

Hahahaha.
No.
Gorillas have the bite force to snap anything sent in their mouths.
This is ignoring the fact they have way too much ground to cover.
Grizzlies are also not > Gorillas by any margin.
keep in mind that One incident you're speaking of had nothing to do with the man choking the grizzly to death, because he couldn't.
he just managed to bite the jugular, because he was lucky enough to get his teeth there and lucky enough to not be stabbed by bearclaws.

actually, at the end he beat it with a stick to take it out after it passed out regardless.


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## puolakanaho (Sep 26, 2015)

AgentAAA said:


> Hahahaha.
> No.
> *Gorillas have the bite force to snap anything sent in their mouths.*
> This is ignoring the fact they have way too much ground to cover.
> ...



>gag reflex.


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## ATastyMuffin (Sep 26, 2015)

Why would any of the fighters even dare shobe their arms down a gorilla's throat

That's like asking to be an amputee

Yeah, no, nobody in this match-up has the balls to do that

Besides the gorilla can grab whoever's attempting to schoke him out and rip him to shreds


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## puolakanaho (Sep 26, 2015)

ATastyMuffin said:


> Why would any of the fighters even dare shobe their arms down a gorilla's throat
> 
> That's like asking to be an amputee
> 
> ...



they are all bloodlusted.


edit: also again, gag reflexes.


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## Totally not a cat (Sep 26, 2015)

And how would they do that before this happens?
[YOUTUBE]trg6gJobfuc[/YOUTUBE]


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## Masa (Sep 26, 2015)

AgentAAA said:


> Hahahaha.
> No.
> Gorillas have the bite force to snap anything sent in their mouths.


Even if the gorilla had the capability of shearing off any apendages that entered it's mouth like a shark (it doesn't), it still doesn't change the fact that a larger than average human arm is lodged in it's throat. It will die from that or from the next guy shoving his arm down its throat pushing the first arm even deeper.


> This is ignoring the fact they have way too much ground to cover.


Not seeing your point here. The gorillas don't have ranged weapons.


> Grizzlies are also not > Gorillas by any margin.


Gorillas get killed by leopards all the time. They have nothing on grizzlies.


> keep in mind that One incident you're speaking of had nothing to do with the man choking the grizzly to death, because he couldn't.
> he just managed to bite the jugular, because he was lucky enough to get his teeth there and lucky enough to not be stabbed by bearclaws.



Gorillas are weaker than grizzlies, don't have claws, and the humans have 28 chances per gorilla. Not to mention the UFC fighters are almost certainly all more fit than the guy who killed the bear and can help out the guy taking on the gorilla if a good opportunity arises.


> actually, at the end he beat it with a stick to take it out after it passed out regardless.


If a gorilla is knocked out, the remaining fighters can rip off it's ball sack and it will bleed to death.


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## Mexikorn (Sep 26, 2015)

Masa said:


> Bloodlust.



bloodlusted gorrilas dont choke
they breathe arms


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## Masa (Sep 26, 2015)

Mexikorn said:


> bloodlusted gorrilas dont choke
> they breathe arms



Hmm...failed to take arm breathing into account. You're right. What was I thinking?


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## puolakanaho (Sep 26, 2015)

so yeah. just to clarify: the reason i have been saying gag reflex over and over about the arm argument is that the gag reflex stops you from biting down or closing your mouth when something big is lodged in your throat and stopping you from breathing.



do not ask me where i learned this.


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## YoungChief (Sep 26, 2015)

So UFC fighters are strong enough to force their arm down a pissed off Gorillas throat, huh, nice of the gorilla to let em do something that ridiculous


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## Masa (Sep 26, 2015)

Another way would be for about 100 of the fighters selected to keep the gorillas busy by taunting, but avoiding the gorillas as much as possible (gorillas don't have the stamina to run their top speeds for very long) while the other 400 kill off several of their own and fashion their bones into spears and bludgeons. Once a few dozen weapons are made, it will be an easy victory by ganging up on individual gorillas who are tired out from chasing around the 100.


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## Masa (Sep 26, 2015)

YoungChief said:


> So UFC fighters are strong enough to force their arm down a pissed off Gorillas throat, huh, nice of the gorilla to let em do something that ridiculous



Doesn't need strength. Only quickness and timing.


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## Tranquil Fury (Sep 26, 2015)

> Humans take heavy losses, but win by shoving their arms down the gorilla's throats and choking them to death



This would be stupid for many reasons, it's not human instinct to put an arm straight into the mouth of an animal capable of biting it off unless precautions are taken. Of all the strategies to use with a 566 vs 20 numbers game, this would be easily the most suicidal.


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## Tranquil Fury (Sep 26, 2015)

I mean a gorilla can and will rip off someone's noise or rake the eyes, getting near to shove a hand into their mouth while they bite and pummel is not smart.


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## YoungChief (Sep 26, 2015)

Masa said:


> Doesn't need strength. Only quickness and timing.



Are you an expert in gorilla gagging? I seriously can't believe this is even being entertained as a legitimate strategy. The UFC loses, good lord people


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## puolakanaho (Sep 26, 2015)

Tranquil Fury said:


> This would be stupid for many reasons, it's not human instinct to put an arm straight into the mouth of an animal capable of biting it off unless precautions are taken. Of all the strategies to use with a 566 vs 20 numbers game, this would be easily the most suicidal.



again. bloodlust and gag reflex...seriously i grow tired of repeating that...


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## YoungChief (Sep 26, 2015)

Idc how pissed you are, shoving ones arm down somethings throat is not plan fucking A, does bloodlusted = batshit insane now? Anyway, how the hell is anyone going to achieve this? "quickness and timing" aint a good enough explanation, get me to buy that a human can force a gorillas mouth open while they're swinging bone breaking blows left and right


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## Tranquil Fury (Sep 26, 2015)

You do realise that reflexively people would shield themselves or jump back?Not to mention fighters don't shove hands into the mouth of an opponent for them to bite, these people are going to fight as they've trained or fought in underground brawls(they may even bite the Gorrilla themselves).

When a bear, crocodile, Gorilla or whatever comes, the first reflex is not to shove a hand into their mouth so it can be bitten off. Bloodlust is not mattering when Gorillas are just as vicious or more so. 

Do you understand what would happen if they tried this?


"Shove hand into Gorilla mouth so it can be bitten off" is not a strategy


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## Masa (Sep 27, 2015)

Tranquil Fury said:


> This would be stupid for many reasons, it's not human instinct to put an arm straight into the mouth of an animal capable of biting it off unless precautions are taken. Of all the strategies to use with a 566 vs 20 numbers game, this would be easily the most suicidal.



It's not suicidal when you have 566 people. It's only suicidal for the few who have to do it. Also, humans fight more effectively not relying on instinct, that's what sets us apart from normal animals, so your point about it not being human instinct is moot.


Tranquil Fury said:


> I mean a gorilla can and will rip off someone's noise or rake the eyes, getting near to shove a hand into their mouth while they bite and pummel is not smart.



It's not smart for the person individually, but serves the cause of the group.


YoungChief said:


> Idc how pissed you are, shoving ones arm down somethings throat is not plan fucking A, does bloodlusted = batshit insane now? Anyway, how the hell is anyone going to achieve this? "quickness and timing" aint a good enough explanation, get me to buy that a human can force a gorillas mouth open while they're swinging bone breaking blows left and right


The gorilla will be going ape shit. It's mouth will be open and screaming. That's what gorillas do when they are pissed off. Also, bloodlust means that they will do whatever it takes to win. If it takes the sacrifice of a few to get the win for the many, they will do it.


Tranquil Fury said:


> You do realise that reflexively people would shield themselves or jump back?Not to mention fighters don't shove hands into the mouth of an opponent for them to bite, these people are going to fight as they've trained or fought in underground brawls(they may even bite the Gorrilla themselves).
> 
> When a bear, crocodile, Gorilla or whatever comes, the first reflex is not to shove a hand into their mouth so it can be bitten off. Bloodlust is not mattering when Gorillas are just as vicious or more so.
> 
> ...



They might try to shield themselves or jump back reflexively, but if the gorilla chomps down, like you suggest, it wont matter. Their arm wont be coming out and the gorilla will still be choking.

Fighters don't shove hands into the mouth of their opponent because of self preservation. If they are going for the win disregarding their own well being, which they will be under bloodlust, shoving their hands into the gorilla's maw is an acceptable strategy.


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## Yami Munesanzun (Sep 27, 2015)

Are there seriously people in this thread that still think that UFC fighters can bare-fist beat down a gorilla?

My sides.


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## shade0180 (Sep 27, 2015)

You do know your strategy won't work when the gorilla is several times stronger and faster than the humans right? 

even without that....

1st problem height discrepancy.. yea try reaching your whole arm to something taller than you, that also has an arm and leg with a speed of a car trying to ram you away from that hole... good luck.

2nd length of time the gorilla leaves their mouth open...
Why wouldn't the gorilla bite right after the fist get shoved?
why would they wait for the whole arm to be shove rather than chew it bit by bit.... 

3rd problem Gorilla can spit... Gorilla knows how to spit just like a common monkey why would you think they won't spit the fucking arm you shoved on their mouth..



Seriously there's no point in debating your scenario because it has no grounds to stand for it to work except for your fantasy world where gorilla doesn't know how to close their mouth...


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## YoungChief (Sep 27, 2015)

Yami Munesanzun said:


> Are there seriously people in this thread that still think that UFC fighters can bare-fist beat down a gorilla?
> 
> My sides.



No, they're arguing that humans are going to choke gorillas by shoving their arms in their throats. UFC fighters first instinct is to ignore the years of martial arts training they have, to shove their arms into a fucking fanged gorilla mouth. Ignore how this will be achieved what with Gorillas going literally ape shit on them throwing out punches that will instantly cripple any human


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## NostalgiaFan (Sep 27, 2015)

YoungChief said:


> No, they're arguing that humans are going to choke gorillas by shoving their arms in their throats.



This is literally on the same tier as Blue with a katana beating a bear.


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## Yami Munesanzun (Sep 27, 2015)

YoungChief said:


> No, they're arguing that humans are going to choke gorillas by shoving their arms in their throats. UFC fighters first instinct is to ignore the years of martial arts training they have, to shove their arms into a fucking fanged gorilla mouth. Ignore how this will be achieved what with Gorillas going literally ape shit on them throwing out punches that will instantly cripple any human



...
...
...

_*MY SIDES*_


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## puolakanaho (Sep 27, 2015)

im just here to say. im highly proud about the way this thread is playing out to be.


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## Hyperion1O1 (Sep 27, 2015)

You should be, now we know who wanks UFC fighters here


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## hammer (Sep 27, 2015)

jackie fucking solos he aint lookin fo no trable


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## Hachibi (Sep 27, 2015)

Holy fuck this thread 

Like, where the hell the argument come form


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## ~M~ (Sep 27, 2015)

I do not doubt a gorilla bloodlusted could rip the face off of 26 men a piece 

Primates are terrifyingly strong


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## corsair (Sep 27, 2015)

So... why can't the Gorillas use their hands to grab the end of the arm in their mouth and pull them out again? They have bitten them off, right? 

Are they that bloodlusted that they would rather choke to death than spend a few seconds to do that? Or rather just grab the friend trying to show his fucking arm into them and push him away? Is there a Gorilla dentist with the UFC that keeps the mouth open to attacks?

Reactions: Funny 1


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## FLORIDA MAN (Sep 27, 2015)

Man someone needs to make a highlight reel of this thread


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## Blue (Sep 27, 2015)

60 UFCs would be enough

Gorillas are not made out of stone

A serious punch from a professional fighter will cave in a gorilla face just as easily as a human one, and a gorilla can't fight three people at once any more than a human can

OBD wanks animals really hard for some reason


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## Hachibi (Sep 27, 2015)

I'm still wonderring how the human could even put their arm in it's mouth in the first place without dying first.

Especially if there's 20 of them.

A bit related: how many professional fighters do you need to put down one Gorilla without weapons?


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## ~M~ (Sep 27, 2015)

the derailment to focusing on arms of all things, an entire arm, down the gullet of an ape, speaks leaps and bounds about the OBD



> Gorillas are not made out of stone
> 
> A serious punch from a professional fighter will cave in a gorilla face just as easily as a human one, and a gorilla can't fight three people at once any more than a human can
> 
> OBD wanks animals really hard for some reason




Who can punch so hard it will kill a man in one blow? A gorilla will gnaw three people right after three people rain their fists on him. The thing also has an 8 foot arm-span.


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## Freddy Mercury (Sep 27, 2015)

Blue said:


> A serious punch from a professional fighter will cave in a gorilla face just as easily as a human one


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## SLB (Sep 27, 2015)

[youtube]4amRA0jl0qI[/youtube]

blue lives in his own world


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## Big Bοss (Sep 27, 2015)

This shit always makes me laugh.

Reactions: Funny 1


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## Hachibi (Sep 27, 2015)

Moody said:


> [youtube]4amRA0jl0qI[/youtube]
> 
> blue lives in his own world



Fuck I wanted to post this.


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## Larcher (Sep 27, 2015)

Blue said:


> 60 UFCs would be enough
> 
> Gorillas are not made out of stone
> 
> ...



that's their fetish


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## Blue (Sep 27, 2015)

Yes, it's called "Education"

Banana tree isn't a tree, it's a bush, you could break one too

Gorillas are obviously stronger than an average dude, but that's because they weigh 350lbs of muscle. A human bigger than that - and they exist - would be at an advantage over one.

Like either of these guys, for instance.



Animal flesh is not magically reinforced with primal fury power. It's just a matter of weight class.

That is Schwarzenegger in the middle looking like a manlet. A gorilla would come up to Wilt's waist. He would pulverize it.


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## Mabel (Sep 27, 2015)

how the hell did i suddenly end up on /b/?


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## The Pirate on Wheels (Sep 27, 2015)

> Gorillas are obviously stronger than an average dude, but that's because they weigh 350lbs of muscle. A human bigger than that - and they exist - would be at an advantage over one.



P. sure ligament and muscle attachment placement and lengths give gorillas and monkeys a extreme leverage advantage over people.  That counts for way more than pounds of muscle.  

But what you don't understand is that UFC fighter are trained to fight with RULES.  Gorillas are geared to fight on the STREETS.  They don't know if their opponent has a gun or a knife or is a tiger, or if that hippo has friends waiting to stomp it's skull in when he takes it to the ground.  So it trains appropriately, and will use bites and stomps and eye gouaches and groin grabs that UFC fighters aren't trained to deal with.  They are social creatures that help each other out in the unpredictable wilds, rather than the UFC fighters who compete 1v1 in an artificial environment.  The UFC fighters don't, and they don't develop skirmishing tactics or team tactics, and while the gorillas eat nothing but organic vegetables and work out day, the UFC probably have some processed foods or skip leg day once in awhile.  Gorillas just don't do that.  So I see the gorillas taking it more times than not because they train to SURVIVE.


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## Tranquil Fury (Sep 27, 2015)

Primates are pound for pound stronger than humans(we got the short end of the stick on that area compared to our fellow apes), Gorillas are not the exception either. We have bonobo monkeys jumping as higher or higher than olympic athletes despite being smaller than humans to show their muscle strength. 

How much a primate is stronger than a human pound for pound has had some exaggerated numbers but they are 2 or 3 times possibly going off some studies.


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## Huey Freeman (Sep 27, 2015)

Wait did Blue suggest 60 UFC fighters can take on 20 gorillas? 


UFC fighters are trained for combat within guidelines and rules. They have zero survival
Skills. Even 60 of the best trained soldiers would probably loss to 20 gorillas but these pretty boys ? They get rekt


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## Tranquil Fury (Sep 27, 2015)

> UFC fighters are trained for combat within guidelines and rules. They have zero survival Skills



No, some of them had to fight underground/no holds barred style to earn cash for a living. UFC fighters are trained to follow rules in an octagon structure in the same way a boxer is forced to avoid doing stuff he'd want to if it's against rules, no reason they'd do that outside when they are free to not follow rules and more unhinged, now not saying a UFC fighter is going toe to toe with a Gorilla but they're not push overs in a real fight.


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## corsair (Sep 27, 2015)

The Pirate on Wheels said:


> Gorillas are geared to fight on the STREETS.

Reactions: Funny 1


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## Tranquil Fury (Sep 27, 2015)




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## puolakanaho (Sep 27, 2015)

this thread just keeps getting better and better.


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## Huey Freeman (Sep 27, 2015)

Tranquil Fury said:


> No, some of them had to fight underground/no holds barred style to earn cash for a living. UFC fighters are trained to follow rules in an octagon structure in the same way a boxer is forced to avoid doing stuff he'd want to if it's against rules, no reason they'd do that outside when they are free to not follow rules and more unhinged, now not saying a UFC fighter is going toe to toe with a Gorilla but they're not push overs in a real fight.



Sorry but that would be a valid point if the UFC consist mostly of trained Martial Artists but fact is most of their fighters are not martial artist and only ever get their training prior to entering the World of MMA which is not the same. They get the basics of jui jitsu but are not a pro in the area and the same goes for the rest of arts they might learn. They are thought what are the common submissions and how to get out of it. That's it.

Oh and underground fights have rules that's why they are not death matches unless you have proof that their is an underground of "street fighter"


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## Huey Freeman (Sep 27, 2015)

Also comparing boxing to MMA is not even close. Boxing is a pure MA so it's a discipline on its own.


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## Deer Lord (Sep 27, 2015)

Does Vitor have TRT?


no,
better yet, is Vitor amped by Jesus?


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## Yami Munesanzun (Sep 27, 2015)

Deer Lord said:


> Does Vitor have TRT?
> 
> 
> no,
> better yet, is Vitor amped by Jesus?



Jesus don't want none of being torn apart by a gorilla.


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## Hyperion1O1 (Sep 27, 2015)

Wilt Chamberlain beating a gorilla?



@TF

I think I remember Nat Geo saying gorillas are six times stronger than humans on the upper body casually. I'm not sure though. 

There are a shit ton of competitions between primates and humans in terms of pulling, climbing, hanging around and stuff, etc the primates weren't even trying and they still won even with a slow start


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## AgentAAA (Sep 27, 2015)

Hyperion1O1 said:


> Wilt Chamberlain beating a gorilla?
> 
> 
> 
> ...



not to mention that with most of these contests they've flat out proven and been incapable of changing the fact that they can't actually make any of them go 100% all out for it. since you can't convince an ape to work at it that hard.


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## Hyperion1O1 (Sep 27, 2015)

[youtube]kbo3jjs4AW0[/youtube]

Ignoring the sensationalist commentary, you can't tell me the Orangutan was going 100%, it was even pissing


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## ~M~ (Sep 27, 2015)

that video was a waste of my time


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## Sans (Sep 27, 2015)

Blue said:


> 60 UFCs would be enough
> 
> Gorillas are not made out of stone
> 
> ...



This post is impressively silly.


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## Lucaniel (Sep 29, 2015)

this has been a great thread 

the ufc get murdered and blue is dumb, but yeah


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## Lucaniel (Sep 29, 2015)

YoungChief said:


> Are you an expert in gorilla gagging?



all-time classic obd quotes

Reactions: Funny 2


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## The World (Feb 10, 2018)

Some other poster had a good idea

the best MMA fighters wait for the weak ones to be slaughtered and they use that time to sharpen the bones of their mutilated corpses and go for gorilla weak spots when distracted killing the shit ones.


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## cingetorix (Feb 10, 2018)

lol a male gorilla is absurdly stronger than almost any human and far more aggressive, along with massive canines and durable skin


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## cingetorix (Feb 10, 2018)

a professional mma fighter is like 3000 joule punches while a gorillas casual ke is like more than double that. humans cant fight great apes much in general


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## lol 4th dimension reiatsu (Feb 10, 2018)

The gorila doesn't know how to check a leg kick so I guess the UFC fighters take this

*Spoiler*: __


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## cingetorix (Feb 10, 2018)

the skeletons alone show how a gorilla bite would pretty much end most humans if its in the neck or head
a female gorilla casually knocked over an adult human with one arm


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## g4snake108 (Feb 10, 2018)

I mean 28 people against 1 gorilla? I am not liking the gorilla's odds..

Seriously,are you people claiming ufc people are that duds that they do not know that if they fight with rules taught to them they are going to get fucked backwards?Any average person will think of strategies to try to kill the gorilla,not oh I am a brute,let me try to fight a gorilla with punches and kicks.The first thing is 8 people surround each gorillaand distract it while the 9th one maybe goes and kicks him in the nuts or something.9 Of them die but you have a severly wounded gorilla.The other 9 do the same but instead of the nuts,blind him by fingers in the eyes.The rest 10 take their time by tiring out the gorillas..

WTF is with the wank..primitive Homo sapiens learnt to defend themselves from wild animals and you are not imagining the current people will think of a way to beat 1 down?

Reactions: Funny 1


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## cingetorix (Feb 10, 2018)

primitive homo sapiens were stronger than modern homo sapiens and had ston weapons. also, this is twenty.

gorillas arent that weak and have fighting stamina and aggression greater than that of a human being while also being quite fast. the gorillas are just gonna maul and rip them apart


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## shade0180 (Feb 10, 2018)

12zoro said:


> primitive Homo sapiens learnt to defend themselves from wild animals



Yea and they didn't use their feet and fist to strike those wild animals, they use weapon, projectiles, barriers and other shit that would stop the animal on their track from slaughtering them. 


> fight takes place in football ring.



another problem here is the setting.
which is basically no different from a cage match and humans wouldn't survive a cage match against wild animals without any protective equipment or weapon..

Reactions: Like 1


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## cingetorix (Feb 10, 2018)

shade0180 said:


> which is basically no different from a cage match and humans wouldn't survive a cage match against wild animals without any protective equipment or weapon..


i wouldnt say that much. a big african dude managed to kill a lioness barehanded but died from wounds shortly after. some humans r strong


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## g4snake108 (Feb 10, 2018)

shade0180 said:


> Yea and they didn't use their feet and fist to strike those wild animals, they use weapon, projectiles, barriers and other shit that would stop the animal on their track from slaughtering them.


Sure.I am comparing their intelligence.Even they understood they could not go against wild animals without tools,and here you guys are thinking the ufc dudes will be going against the gorillas with the mindset - 'hey lets try to kick and punch them like we do to other humans and we will win'.

They are not going to play by ufc rules a=nor are they going to think that they will even for 1 second overpower a gorilla.They know they will be fucked and the best way is to distract and attack.



> another problem here is the setting.
> which is basically no different from a cage match and humans wouldn't survive a cage match against wild animals without any protective equipment or weapon..


A football field is still big enough.Maybe a bit cramped,yeah.But the animals also have nowhere to hide.A circle around each gorilla means the gorilla is going to be confused.Animals even though bloodlusted are scared of dozens of people trying to gang up on them.It's not in their nature to go gung-ho.

Maybe the location may affect the fate- I don't know.But if there is enough space to spread out the gorillas to form rings around each one,humans are winning.


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## Iwandesu (Feb 10, 2018)

>2 years old necro
As a mod i herebly declare that gorila threads died with harambe.
GORILLA PUNCH

Reactions: Like 1 | Funny 1


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